Smug Marrieds & Jam Hands
by WritelkeUmeanit
Summary: The manically, marvelous married life of Luke and Lorelai Danes. Not impressed? Well, what if Lorelai met Luke when she arrived in Stars Hollow? I know, you've been there, read that. But what if Luke's parents were alive and well? Drama/Romance/Family.
1. No Smoking No Talking Kissing Allowed

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the manically, marvelous married life of Luke and Lorelai Danes! Not impressed? Have you been there, read that? Well, how 'bout I throw in one very large monkey wrench with a twist of epic proportions. What if Lorelai met Luke when she first arrived in Stars Hollow? Again, I know what you're thinking. That's old news, right? Well, what if Luke's parents were alive and well? Dun dun dun!

Now before you scroll down, let me give some backround info. This baby kicks up during what would be the 1st season of GG. Let's pretend Luke and Lorelai met when she first moved to Stars Hollow. And while we're in happy, fantasy world, let's also pretend they didn't go through 8 years of foreplay before sharing their first kiss. Let's say they bantered and flirted for 10 years before getting m-rated (don't worry; there's a method to my madness). After some fighting, a few breakups, lots of makeup's, and settling their respective issues with Chris and Rachel, they got hitched. There's a lot more to cover, but all the other changes will be revealed as we go. :D

Read on!

**Smug Marrieds & Jam Hands**

**Chapter One: No Smoking. No Talking. Kissing Allowed.**

_Friday_

_2001 – January_

It was that time of year. The firelight festival and all it's glory and mayhem had arrived upon Stars Hollow once again.

High in the sky was the sun; it's weak rays leaking through tiny flurries that sprinkled from puffy white clouds. There was a chill in the air, but despite the low temperature, the town was filled with plenty of hustle and bustle as people gathered to prepare for the festivities.

"Well, look who's in a rush."

"Hey, Patty."

"And where are you hurrying off to so fast?"

Lorelai barely slowed her brisk pace to turn to the dance studio where Patty was leaning against the railing with a cigarette hanging from her hand. Right behind her was a room full of little dancers who were practicing the routine that would kick off the festivities later that night.

"There's a cheeseburger right down the block that's calling my name. Actually, scratch that; it's shouting my name, shouting at the top of its lungs from the roof top!" Lorelai exclaimed.

"If I were you, I'd have an order of Luke instead. His buns are grade A," Patty said through a mischievous grin before taking another drag.

"Keep your hands to yourself, Patty!" Lorelai shouted as she ran across the street.

"What the hell are you thinking?"

Lorelai's lips instantly curved to a frown at the scene near the diner. Luke was fighting with his dad again. Ever since he caught Will smoking last month, they've been battling over the issue. Lorelai tried to stay neutral, but she wasn't happy with the nasty habit either, especially after all the medical complications Will went through when Luke was a teen.

"Hey," Lorelai said, her voice cautious as she approached the men.

Luke turned to the voice but even seeing his wife didn't wipe the annoyance and anger from his face.

"I come out here to take out the trash and look what I catch him doing."

Lorelai's frowning face focused on the cigarette in Luke's hand. Her questioning eyes then drifted to her father in law. She couldn't seem to muster up the anger that radiated from Luke as her sad, blue eyes were pleading for an answer.

"Aw, Lorelai," the man groaned while tearing his gaze from her pouting lips. "I'm sorry," he apologized helplessly.

"Yeah, you're sorry when she comes around, but I gotta fight you to get the damn thing from your mouth," Luke accused angrily. "I swear, if I see you doing this again, I will tell mom," he promised, the words a solid threat as he tossed the bud to the ground, then stomped out the light before huffing his way back to the diner.

After Luke disappeared, Lorelai sighed while focusing on Will. Their eyes didn't hold for long before a pair of dark blue orbs floated to the ground in shame.

"It'll break her heart," Lorelai whispered while reaching to touch Will's shoulder.

The man nodded in understanding.

"We just don't want you to get sick again."

"That was it. I'm done," he vowed.

"Promise?"

Will nodded.

"Swear on your grandsons?"

"Will's gaze snapped from the cement. What he saw was Lorelai's hopeful eyes staring back at him.

"Someone has to teach Andy how to play poker. I suck at it and Luke thinks betting money is a waste of time. Without you, he'll never learn how to do that card flippy trick thing."

Will nodded enthusiastically as his face lit up in an instant. "Now that you mention it, it's time for his lessen!"

"Hey, you interrupt naptime and you'll be the one on the graveyard shift when he wakes up crying in the middle of the night!"

But Will just kept on going, the man filled with a spark of energy at the thought of some time with his grandson. If Lorelai didn't have a heart, she would've stopped Will from hurrying past the curtain and to the second floor where her baby was sound asleep in his pack n play; instead she headed for the counter and plopped down on a stool.

Luke was standing on the other side, a rag in his hand as he cleared the counter for atleast the 20th time that morning.

"So, you know what your mom said to me last night."

Nothing.

"We were talking about Louis Vuitton and outta nowhere she requests- no, she _demands_ another grandbaby by Christmas."

Nothing.

"She said it's not fair that her friend Gina has 5 grandchildren to spoil and she only has one… well, three, but Jess and Rory are big now… have been for quite some time."

Still nothing.

"Andy's not even a year old and already his nana is sick of him. But you know your mom, twice as stubborn as you are, so you know what that means. We gotta get our baby makin' grove going and fast. If I don't pop out a freshly baked one by Christmas, I'll never hear the end of it."

"Yeah, okay, fine," Luke agreed distractedly before disappearing to the kitchen.

After sulking at the counter for a minute or two, Lorelai gave up. She knew to let her husband be when he had something important on his mind. Lorelai was sure Luke was hiding in the kitchen to avoid people, his mind brewing with worry over his father's health. Maybe he'd want to talk later, but Lorelai was positive she wouldn't be able to break through the fog that clouded his mind before he had a chance to sort out his feelings for himself first.

_XOX_

"Pay attention, okay?" Lorelai heard a deep, friendly voice say as she climbed the stairs to the office. "This is a card tick only the pros have mastered. But I cracked the code. I know their secret."

Not wanting to disturb the fun, Lorelai pushed the door open carefully, just enough to peak through the thin slit.

"See what it is? No, no, don't grab it. I have to put it back in the pile."

Lorelai smiled when her baby's chubby little hand reached for the two of hearts his papa showed him.

"Wait, wait, I'm getting your card."

Lorelai's grin furthered while Will rushed to complete the trick as Andy was leaning

further and further for the card he wanted.

"Okay, okay, look, I got it! Is this your card?" Will asked excitedly while whipping out a 5 of clubs.

"Not even close," Lorelai whispered.

When a card appeared within reach, Andy quickly reached to grab it and this time he was too fast for his grandpa to react. When the baby had the card between his fingers, he smiled while plucking the pacifier from his lips.

"Hey, hey, no mouth!" Lorlai shouted while rushing into the room.

Two pairs of blue eyes- one lighter than the other- darted to Lorelai. Andy's were wide like a deer caught in headlights; Will's were big with excitement.

"Did I get it this time?"

"If I say yes, will you know I'm lying?"

Will sighed while dropping the deck to the table.

"25 years ago I could do that trick with my hands tied behind my back and a blindfold over my eyes," he gloated while getting to his feet. "Don't get old," his low voice warned his daughter- in- law.

"As soon as I find that fountain of youth, I will drink from the eternal spring and stay forever young," Lorelai promised as she heaved her baby to her hip.

"Save some for me. And your mother," he added. "She'll be real happy to live forever."

Lorelai smiled while thinking of the woman who always treated her like a daughter, despite the lack of a biological link. Just like Mia Holloway always had.

"I will."

_XOX_

_Independence Inn_

"I can't believe it," Sookie awed while pressing her hand to her heart. "His first birthday is this weekend. I just can't believe it."

"Knew the water works would come eventually," Lorelai gloated through a soft smile.

"Shut up," Sookie murmured weakly as she wiped her eyes. "You should be crying too. It's your son's birthday that's right around the corner."

"Next Sunday," Lorelai agreed through a sigh.

"Hey, where's- there she is!"

Lorelai and Sookie turned to find Valerie Danes speeding through the kitchen.

"Look what I found!" the woman boosted while skidding to a stop in front of Lorelai to show her daughter the flyer in her hand.

Lorelai took the paper, and then focused her eyes on the words. "**Have your child a fun Toy Story themed party at a low discount price. Come to Party World for Toy Story cups, plates, napkins, streamers, piñatas, and etc. You won't find prices lower than these from here to New York. Guaranteed**… Toy Story? Really?" Lorelai asked through a wince.

"You know I adore that movie," Val gushed.

"I don't think Pixar was aiming for your age demographic when they came up with the idea of talking toys, but yes, I know," Lorelai answered through a smirk.

Valerie rolled her eyes. "Disney movies are for everyone."

Lorelai smiled further while leaning to Sookie's ear to whisper, "she has a thing for Buzz."

"The space guy?" Sookie questioned while frowning.

"No, not Buzz, Tim Allen. I just love his voice. It puts me in this trance. I could listen to him read the phone book all day and it would never get old," Val said through a dreamy sigh.

"Ooohhh, you're crushing on another man; I'm telling Will," Lorelai sang.

"Oh, please, he's known for years," Valerie waved off. "Anyway, Tory Story party, what do you say?"

"I say you're an evil genius. This is why you begged me to name my son Andy. You envisioned this day. You saw us having this very conversation. You knew I would buy him that silly little red cowboy hat, stick a Buzz toy in one hand, a Woody toy in the other, fire up the camera, reenact the cheesiest scene from the movie in a room with enough Toy Story crap to make Luke crazy and that would be that," Lorelai explained.

"How long have you been planning this? Before or after conception?" she asked through narrowed eyes.

Valerie spread the biggest smile. "Maybe I planned it," she said through a shrug. "But I stand by what I said. I love the name Andy. My father would be happy to know you named his great grandson after him."

"Yeah, yeah. That was just your cover story," Lorelai waved off. "I bet your dad's name wasn't even Andy. It was probably Bobby or Timmy or Spongebob-"

"Spongebob?" Sookie questioned.

"I have no idea. It's a big mess up there," Lorelai said while pointing to her forehead.

"I'll do all the shopping," Val promised. "You just take care of the guest list. Sookie, is it safe to assume you're catering?"

"I am a great chef and one of Andy's God parents. You bet your butt I'm catering!"

Valerie smiled. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have even asked."

Lorelai pat her friend's shoulder while looking to Val. "Have you seen that wonderful husband of mine? He's supposed to return the off spring at 1:00. Poor little guy has a check up in 20 minutes."

"He's outside by the lake. They're feeding the ducks."

Lorelai nodded. "I'll go scoop little Luke up. Are you heading back to the diner?"

Valerie nodded.

"Rory's stopping by there after school to work a few hours. Then around 7:00 we'll head over to the festival with two fully-grown men kicking and screaming along the way."

"Yes, and when we get there, the girls will have some fun while the whiny boys stand off to the side with their arms crossed over their chests and sour pusses covering their faces."

"Sounds like a plan."

_Stars Hollow Pediatrics_

"Mama," Andy murmured sadly, his face nestled in the crock of Lorelai's neck as she swayed back and forth.

"What, baby?" she asked, her hushed tone matching Andy's.

The boy lifted a dimpled finger to the door.

"Don't worry, we're almost done," Lorelai assured the little baby while wiping his tear stained cheek.

Before Lorelai could say another word, Dr. Stevens came through the door with a smile.

"How are we doing, Lorelai?"

"I don't know. That depends on what's in that folder. You have that look on your face."

"Don't worry. I come bearing good news. We ran his blood; everything there is normal. His vision, his hearing- all that is great. He's a healthy baby. But I do have one, tiny concern."

"What? What's wrong?" Lorelai fired quickly.

"Well, you mentioned that he doesn't talk very much."

"Yeah," Lorelai agreed carefully as her face fell further.

"What's his vocabulary? List some words for me."

"He says mama, dada, and baba. We've been trying to get him to say papa for grandpa, but no go."

"What do you call his grandmother?"

"Nana. He hardly addresses anyone though. He says mama more than anything, and that's not too often," Lorelai reported. "He doesn't see his other grandparents too much, but we try to get him to call them Mima and Mampa."

"Any other words?"

Lorelai shook her head.

Dr. Stevens put the cap to his pen after writing the last word. He then looked to the baby who was hiding behind his mother's dark hair.

"Still shy, huh, little guy?"

"He's not too good with strangers yet. Not that you're a stranger, but-"

"I know what you mean. I'm the doctor. Kids hate the doctor."

Lorelai smiled, her lips moving to a tentative curve.

"Okay, here's the deal. He's speaking, and that's great. Right now I wouldn't worry at all. He says 3 words and that's good."

"But…" Lorelai hedged. "I know there's a but."

"But right now his vocabulary should be anywhere from 5-10 words. He's only a few words behind which is nothing to worry about. What does concern me is that he isn't speaking much. He isn't trying to."

"What can I do? Should I talk to him more? Read to him more? What? How do I fix it?" Lorelai asked anxiously.

The doctor smiled. "There's nothing to fix, Lorelai. He's okay," he assured her.

Lorelai nodded before putting her lips to Andy's forehead and leaving a kiss to his warm skin.

"I do have to ask though, how often does he have one of those in his mouth?"

Lorelai looked down at the pacifier.

"Define often."

Dr. Steven's grinned. "That may be stopping him from trying. What I want you to do is take that away. Toss 'em all in the trash. And just keep talking. Keep reading. Don't do anything more, don't do anything less. He should pick up the words and start repeating."

"But what if he doesn't?"

"Well, if by 18 months or so, his vocabulary hasn't expanded enough or at all, we'll do some tests. He'll probably just need some speech therapy and that should do the trick."

"But what if even that doesn't work?"

"Don't worry about that now, okay? We'll cross that bridge if we come to it. For now, just keep track of the words he says. See if things kick up after you throw out the binkies. Okay?"

Lorelai nodded while hugging her baby a little tighter.

The doctor smiled while hopping from the desk. "Really, Lorelai, he's okay. He isn't too far behind. He can see the finish line; he may just need a little push to get across. That's all. He's okay.

"Yeah," the worried mom murmured while forcing a smile.

"I'll see you in six months, okay? And from there, we'll see how we're doing," the doctor promised before leaving the room.

Lorelai sighed.

_XOX_

_Firelight Festival_

"I can't believe it's our 3 month anniversary," Rory awed.

Lorelai smiled while wrapping her arms around her daughter's shoulder. "Just don't let Luke see you necking by the fire. If he catches you, he'll probably dive between you two, fall into the bonfire, and then I'll be left with a burnt and crispy husband. For the occasional sniffle or cough, yeah, I'm a kick ass nurse, but let's face it, I am nowhere near qualified enough to take care of someone whose been lit on fire. Luke's suffering would be endless."

Rory rolled her eyes but a smirk tugged at her lips.

"Hey, girls."

The mother- daughter duo turned to find Valerie coming up behind them.

"Sweetie, Dean's waiting for you by the fire."

"Okay, thanks Grandma. I'll see you later," the teen promised before heading off to her date.

"They grow up so fast, huh?"

"That they do," Lorelai agreed.

"I remember when she was just a baby. She wouldn't go to bed until you read at least four stories to her."

"She always tried for five."

"And you always gave in."

Lorelai smiled. "She may have gotten me to read five, but she got you to read seven. Sucker."

Valerie smiled at Lorelai's grin. "And now look at her. All grown up with a boyfriend. My, where has the time gone?"

"It must have followed Alice into the rabbit hole. The queen of hearts is probably holding it hostage."

"And what are two beautiful woman like yourselves doing without men by your sides?"

"Oh, Will," Valerie started without turning around. "I can't believe, after all these years,

you're still trying to flirt with me."

"Is it working?"

"Maybe."

"Brought you some punch."

Valerie turned to narrow her hazel eyes at her husband. "Are you trying to get me drunk?"

"Why yes I am, ma'am," he said through a huge smile while wrapping his arm around her waist. "What do you say?"

"I say, you know that punch is pure poison and you wouldn't let me drink it no matter how much I begged," Val said while falling to his chest. They shared a smile before she kissed the corner of his lips.

"Guess I don't need this," Will murmured while tipping the liquid to the grass.

"Aw, look at you two. Still sharing the love."

"Hey, whats- Oh, jeez, don't do that out here," Luke groaned.

Lorelai looked to her right where Luke appeared at her side. "Your turn, Butch. Plant one on me and make it good."

"Not here."

"But why?" Lorelai whined. "Everybody else is."

"Inside," Luke growled.

"Don't know why I married you. You won't even kiss me in public."

"I cook."

"Won't have sex with me on the beach either," she murmured.

"Lorelai!" Luke hissed.

"Well, you won't. _One time_ sand gets to a place where it shouldn't be and you swear off the idea for the rest of your life. Not fair."

"Hey, no shimmy-shammy in public," Will warned.

Val rolled her eyes while tugging on her husband's hand. "We'll see you kids later."

After watching them head for the snack carts, Lorelai sighed. "And then there were two."

Luke nodded. "So you never told me what happened at the doctor."

"Oh, right. Can we talk about it later?"

"Why? What happened?" Is something wrong?"

"No, no, he's fine, he's healthy. It's nothing major, I promise, but later. Please? I just want to enjoy this with you."

"Okay," Luke agreed skeptically.

"Thank you."

Luke nodded. "Come here," he demanded, his voice low.

Lorelai smiled while wrapping her arms around his back and pressing her cheek to his flannel covered chest.

"Where is your mini me, anyway?"

"Babette's taking him for a walk."

"So it's just you and me for a little while?"

"Yup."

"Good." Lorelai tipped her face up to meet his eyes. "We sill in love?"

"Yup."

"Say the words."

"Why?"

"Luke."

The man sighed. "Love you," he mumbled.

Lorelai's smile turned to a thousand watt grin. "I love you too."

_TBC…_

**Review before you go? Please and thank you! :D**

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	2. Heart Break Hollow

Thank you all for the positive feedback! I know we're treading new waters here, but I hope you'll stick along for the ride! I guarantee you'll love what's to come! :D

Before we get going here, I need to give a bit of background info first.

_As far as Liz goes, she never did drugs. She still had Jess when she was a teen, but we'll say that was thanks to a night of failed protection. She's that free spirit we all know and love, but she's got a better head on her shoulders. She left home right after high school to pursue art. (I always thought with her creativity and independence, she would be an artistic person, if only she grew up in a stable environment to get her on the right track.) When she had Jess, Jimmy fled and she knew she was incapable of raising a child. She wanted too much from life and she knew she couldn't handle it. So she left Jess with her parents who basically raised him. Every now and then, Liz would visit or whisk her son away for an adventurous weekend, but for the most part, Jess grew up in Stars Hollow with his grandparents. _

_Jess is reserved, but he's driven. He never really liked school and felt it did nothing for him, so he got his GED and left. He has his mother's sense of adventure and passion for the arts. But he's quiet about his love for the written word, unlike his mother who would shout her passion from the rooftops. He's very much into reading. He always has a book in his back pocket. He wants to be an author. Being independent, he lives in his own apartment in Stars Hollow while working at Walmart to pay his rent_. _He refuses to accept help. He wants to do it on his own. _

For the most part, the past will be revealed through flashbacks and conversations within the story. Past years will be shown in flashback snippets and spoken through dialogue. I feel it's a more interesting read that way. :D

And now that the super long authors note is complete, let's get to the new chapter!

Enjoy!

**Smug Marrieds & Jam Hands**

**Chapter Two: Heart Break Hollow**

_Wednesday_

"So, dinner with your parents tonight."

"Yup."

With her eyes on the vanity mirror, Lorelai looked past her reflection to find Luke sitting on the edge of the bed with a pack of cigarettes in his hand. A frown instantly took her face.

"Your dad?"

Luke nodded. "Found 'em in the office. He said he just forgot to throw 'em out."

"Well, then go ahead, do it for him," Lorelai said while pulling a small trash can from underneath the vanity.

Luke sighed while getting to his feet, then tossing the poisonous sticks to the garbage.

Lorelai smiled while giving her husband's arm a reassuring squeeze. "He's done, babe. He has to be."

"Yeah," Luke agreed quietly with his stare zeroed in on the pack of Marlboro's.

Lorelai kissed Luke's scruffy cheek. When she pulled back, she brushed her thumb over his stubble, gently working her kiss to his skin.

"So, how come no Bud and Maisy tonight?"

"It's their anniversary."

"Oh, right, right."

"They'll be there Sunday though, for the party," Luke explained while swapping his grease stained flannel for a grey T-shirt. His mom couldn't stand his plaid and insisted he wear something- anything else to dinner.

"Okay, good. Oh, and Rory's busy tonight, so it's just us."

"Busy doing what?" Luke's muffled voice asked as he pulled a new shirt over his head.

"She has plans."

"What plans?"

Lorelai sighed. "She just needs a night alone, okay? But she doesn't want you to know she's upset. She doesn't want anyone to know. I came home last night and found her crying over a tube of Ben and Jerry's. I thought this is great, she's letting it all out, she's wallowing, but then today she spends the day locked up in her room. She needs time, Luke. She's trying to get through her first heartbreak. It isn't easy."

Luke nodded in understanding. "I swear, if I see that kid…"

"Down boy."

_XOX _

_Danes Home_

"I love that your parents live three blocks away. The commute goes by like that," Lorelai said with a snap of her fingers.

Luke nodded while pushing along their son's stroller.

"Do you know what we're having tonight?"

"Chicken."

"And desert?"

"Fruit," Luke reported through a smirk.

"Again?" Lorelai groaned. "This whole healthy way of living crap has gotta stop. My body's gonna go into a lack of sugar shock."

A moment of silence went by before Luke murmured the words, "she made a cheesecake too."

Lorelai's eyes lit up. "Really?"

Luke shrugged. "She knows you've been wanting one."

"Your mom makes THE best cheesecake in the world. Hear that, Andy? Grandma made cheesecake!" Lorelai cheered while holding her hand up.

Andy smiled wide while leaning forward to slap his small hand to his mom's bigger one.

"Wow, no B-I-N-K-Y. I can't believe we left the house without it. And here I thought your daddy was an old softie."

"He was drinking a bottle when we left the house," Luke explained while grinning.

"Oh, that's right," Lorelai realized through a frown. "Well, he's okay now. Maybe he forgot about it."

"Maybe," Luke agreed doubtfully.

_XOX_

_CrapShack_

Rory was lying across her bed wearing her favorite red candy cane p.j's that Luke got her for Christmas. A pillow was propped underneath her chest and her history textbook sat in front of her. She was studying for her midterm. Well, trying to study, but every other minute or so her mind drifted to Dean. Her eyes welled but she always caught herself before the tears fell. She swore she wouldn't cry again. She wouldn't be _that_ girl, that girl who falls apart just because she doesn't have a boyfriend.

Just when she finished reviewing the outcome of the civil war, there was a tap at her window. When she looked up, her lips curved to a wide smile at the person on the other side.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" Rory asked after opening the window.

"Got off work early. Heard you were alone tonight. Figured you'd need this," he said while tossing a VHS to her bed.

"Let me guess. Pee wee's Playhouse?"

Jess grinned. "That freak usually brightens up your day, right?"

Rory smiled while reaching for the tape. "You forgot the red vines."

Jess shook his head while pulling a box from his back pocket. "And when you run outta those, here."

Rory grabbed the bag of mini reeses cups that followed the red vines to her mattress.

"Know how much you like peanut butter and chocolate."

"Thank you."

Jess nodded. "I'll let you get back to your alone night."

"Wait, why don't you stay? I mean, I can't finish all this candy by myself."

Jess gave her a knowing look.

"Okay, so maybe I can, but really, you should stay. I know Pee wee Herman creeps you out, but we can watch something else. Oh, remember when we were kids, you always made me watch batman with you? I think mom still has the tapes lying around here somewhere. She recorded a million episodes because that's all you ever wanted to watch,"

Rory reminded him with a smirking smile on her face.

"I liked that crap when I was five. I stopped drooling over the bat mobile years ago."

"Come on, please," Rory begged. "Take a trip down memory lane with me. Please."

As much as Jess dreaded the thought of having to watch batman for hours on end, he couldn't say no. And so he dropped his keys to her bed while heading for the living room.

"I'll find the tapes."

"Great! I'll order Chinese!"

_XOX_

_Danes Home_

"No, you can't have that," Luke scolded while pushing the peppershaker to the center of the table.

"Put him in his highchair," Lorelai said.

"He'll just wanna get out."

"Oh, put him down. The living room is baby proof; you know that. He can wander around," Val said while setting a plate of chicken breasts to the table.

"He has to eat," Luke argued.

"So, he'll eat after play time, it's okay. Gimme that little boy, I'll set him up inside," Val offered while scooping her grandson from his father's lap.

Luke sighed at Andy's full plate of peas and mini raviolis that remained untouched.

"Ya know what I think? If he's hungry, he'll eat," Will reasoned while forking a piece of chicken to his plate. "But you shouldn't make him eat when he isn't hungry. That's no good. We only fed you when you wanted to eat. If you got up in the middle of the night asking for food, we fed you. You eat when you're hungry. That's how it goes."

"He barely had any lunch," Luke threw in with his eyes on Lorelai.

"Oh, you skipped lots of meals," Will said while cutting up his chicken. "There were plenty of days where you ate nothing but a few cookies and some carrots."

"Those were the days I left you alone with your father," Val said in passing while sparring a warning glance to her husband. "They were few and far between."

Will waved the words away. "Anyway, look at you, you turned out fine, and so will Andy. Now, pass the barbeque sauce."

_XOX_

_CrapShack_

Batman and Robin saved the day yet again as Rory nibbled on a red vine. Just as the credits rolled down the screen, she turned to Jess who sat with his feet propped on the coffee table and his hands folded behind his head.

"So, how's the next great American novel coming along?"

"I don't know. You tell me."

"Journalists don't write great American novels. Writers do."

"Then maybe you should ask a writer."

Rory rolled her eyes. "Jess."

"I've been working a lot, picking up over time. I can't miss rent. I'll get kicked outta my apartment if I do."

"But the whole reason you quit school was so you could focus on writing. I know you're dying to become an author."

Jess shrugged. "Forklift and I have been getting along real well. Thinking about sticking with that for a while."

"Oh, come on, admit it. You dream about seeing your name in ink."

"I have to work. It's okay, the writing thing can wait."

Rory frowned, but she let the conversation drop as another episode of batman filled the T.V.

_XOX_

_Danes Home_

"Oh my God, I've died and gone to heaven," Lorelai moaned after swallowing a mouthful of desert.

"It's been ages since I've baked my famous cheesecake. I thought it was about time I satisfied my sweet tooth. And of course, yours," Val added through a smirk aimed at Lorelai.

"Amen, sister friend!"

"So, how's Rory? Poor thing. I wish she would've come tonight."

"She's okay," Lorelai said after a hard swallow. "She just wanted a night to herself, you know? I'm just glad she finally wallowed."

"Wallow?" Will asked while looking to Luke who only shrugged before taking a small bite from his small piece of cheesecake.

"It's what a girl does after a breakup," Val explained.

Lorelai nodded. "Wallowing- if looked up in the dictionary, you'd find a picture of a girl wearing her p.j's while sitting in the dark, eating ice cream and pizza with a tear jerker playing on T.V. A good cry can work wonders."

Will shook his head. He was confused to say the least. "So, she's okay?"

"Getting there."

Will looked up at his wife and said, "I wish you would let me go after that punk."

"Me too," Luke grumbled.

"If you boys can't control yourselves, you won't be allowed out tomorrow," Lorelai warned while pointing her fork at both men.

"Kid needs to be taught a lesson."

"Needs to leave town is what he needs," Luke added.

Lorelai looked to her mother in law. "So, I'll get the leashes; you get the collars?"

"Make Will's pink."

"Oh, with sparkles!"

"And a pinch of glitter. Glitter would be wonderful."

"Glitter would be amazing," Lorelai agreed through a devious grin.

_XOX_

_CrapShack_

"Okay, enough of this crap. I'm putting some-"

Before Jess could finish his sentence, he looked over to find Rory leaning against his shoulder, the girl asleep.

Carefully, without disturbing her, Jess got to his feet. He lowered Rory's head to a pillow,

and then put her legs to the couch. After making sure she didn't stir, he grabbed a throw blanket from the recliner, then spread it over her sleeping body. He left the edge to her hip, then looked up to find a stray brown lock fallen over her face. Gently, Jess tucked her soft hair behind her ear. Apart of him wanted to keep smoothing his fingers through her silky hair. Another part of him wanted to kiss her forehead. An even bigger part of him wanted to kiss her lips.

Through a sigh, Jess stood erect while ducking to her room to grab his keys. He needed to go. Too many thoughts were running through his head, thoughts that he knew he shouldn't be thinking.

Jess was rounding the foyer, but before he could reach the door, it swung open.

"Oh, hey you," Lorelai said, a smile on her face at the sight of her nephew. "You come to check on Rory?"

Jess nodded.

"How's she doing?"

"Okay. Better I think."

Lorelai smiled further. "Good. I'm glad she wasn't alone tonight. I tried to get her to come with us, but she didn't want to. Thanks for making sure she had some family around."

Jess nodded. "I should get home. Work tomorrow."

Lorelai nodded in understanding. "Maybe you'll come to dinner next week? Here, same time as always?"

"If I'm not working, I'll be here."

"Okay. Night, Jess."

The 17 year old gave a small nod and smile before slipping from the door. On the way out he passed his uncle. They exchanged goodnights while Luke was lifting Andy to his hip, and then they went their separate ways.

It was just a few blocks to his apartment. He lived around the corner from Dooses market. It was a 2- 3 minute stroll, max. And during those 2-3 minutes, Jess couldn't help but think about what Lorelai said. Family. He was family. He and Rory were family. Maybe they weren't blood related, but they were family. But over the past couple of months, ever since Rory started dating, Jess began to feel differently. Maybe even jealous, though he would never admit it.

For so many years, he saw Rory as his aunt's daughter, as a cousin. They grew up together. They spent so many afternoons watching movies and reading the same books. One day, he tried to teach her how to climb a tree. They both fell. She broke her arm. He twisted his ankle. They were best friends.

But Jess wanted more and he knew that was wrong. It was so wrong.

_XOX _

_CrapShack_

"Night, babe," Lorelai whispered before kissing Rory's forehead.

The proud mom of two pulled the covers to her daughter's chest, and then she put the T.V on mute before heading up to the second floor.

When she reached the third step, the crying began.

Lorelai winced while climbing the stairs. After passing her room, she rounded the hall to the bathroom turned bedroom. When word of Andy arrived, Luke came up with the idea of turning the bathroom into a bedroom and renovating the one downstairs. 3 people sharing one bathroom wasn't always perfect, but it was a solution.

"Hey," Lorelai murmured with a worried frown while crossing into her son's room.

"Hey," Luke returned with his hands on his cap as he stood over his baby's crib. The little boy was on his feet; his face beat red as tears fell down his cheeks.

"Oh, baby, it's okay," Lorelai soothed while lifting the boy then laying him back to the mattress.

But just as quickly as Andy was down, he was back up again, his outstretched arms begging for someone to pick him up.

"You know what he wants," the tired Danes said gruffly.

"Luke-"

"What's the big deal if we just give it to him at night? It helps him sleep. He doesn't talk when he's sleeping. So what's the problem?"

"He went all day without it. Giving it to him now would be like taking 5 giant steps backwards."

"But look at him, Lorelai. He's so upset because he doesn't have that stupid thing. He keeps pointing to the drawer. He knows we kept 'em there."

"I know," Lorelai agreed, her voice quiet as her eyes remained focused on her crying baby. "But we have to see this through, Luke. The doctor said no more. We have to do this. He needs to talk more. We can't let this turn into a problem. We have to fix it now. I just… I can't, I don't want anything to be wrong with him, I can't."

"Okay, okay, it's okay," Luke gave in while gathering his wife in his arms.

Lorelai took a shaky breath as her eyes fell closed and she pressed her cheek to his shirt.

Luke held Lorelai tight with his lips to the top of her head and his worried stare on their crying son.

_TBC…_

**What do you think? Review? Please, and Thank you, :D**


	3. Smile, It's Your Birthday

Way too much time passed since I've updated, I know, but I was able to hit the pause button on the schoolwork the last couple of days, spent the time writing, and out came this. I have to admit, I'm liking this whole long chapter thing but I'm warning you all that odds are I won't whip out another 8000 words plus chapter again anytime soon. I got lucky with this. Here's to hoping it's quality matches it's length, :D.

Read on! Enjoy!

**Smug Marrieds & Jam Hands**

**Chapter 3: Smile, It's Your Birthday**

_Sunday_**  
**

_Crapshack_

"Andy, please, quit the water works; you're fine."

"Lorelai, let's go!" Luke called from the door.

"I'm coming!" Lorelai shouted impatiently.

"Okay, I'm ready," Rory announced while popping from her room.

"It's about time, Miss Perfection. You mind taking the crankiest boy in the world out to the car?"

Rory nodded while bending to the kitchen floor to scoop up her baby brother who sat fussing by the child proof locked cabinets.

"Why is he in such a bad mood? It's his birthday; he should be happy," Rory said while bouncing Andy on her hip, but the move just spurred further tearless cries.

"I wouldn't let him play rock star drummer boy. I have a headache the size of Texas."

Rory frowned. "Are you getting sick?"

"Just couldn't sleep last night," Lorelai explained while packing water bottles in a cooler that sat on the table.

"You should take something."

"I've already popped more pills than a senior citizen with high blood pressure, high cholesterol and senile tendencies. Hasn't helped."

"Maybe you're just stressed. You should take a break, relax for a bit."

"I can't. There's still so much to do. I wish I could, I'm so tired. Andy had a horrible night. If you were here, you probably would've woken up 20 times. Trying to break the B-I-N-K-Y habit has been brutal; he wont' sleep without it. And today is gonna be crazy. My parents are coming, and we all know they don't play well with others. I cannot for the life of me figure them out. They can go weeks- months without seeing their grandkids, but when they do and Will and Val are around they all get all weird. Luke thinks they're jealous. I don't know. It just doesn't add up."

"Lorelai!"

"We're late! I know! I'm coming!"

"He sounds happy," Rory said sarcastically.

"Yeah, well, he had a bad night too."

"Mama," Andy whined while squirming from Rory's grasp and reaching for Lorelai.

"Stay with Rory. I have to finish packing."

"I'll bring him out."

"Thank you."

Rory quickly turned from the kitchen while Lorelia sighed a breath before continuing to fill the coolers.

15 minutes later, Luke pulled up to Miss Patty's with Lorelai behind him.

"Andy, please," Lorelai begged while putting the jeep in park. "You need a nap, cranky boy. You barely slept last night."

Luke hurried from the truck, having heard his son's tired, frustrated cries during the 2-minute drive. When he appeared at Lorelai's window, she was undoing her seatbelt.

"I'll take him for a walk. Maybe he'll nod off."

"Maybe," Lorelai agreed hopefully. "Rory and I will start unpacking."

"My parents should be here any minute to help. Bud and Maisy are coming early too."

"So is Sookie."

Luke nodded. "What time is Mia coming in?"

"12:00."

"I'll get her."

"No, I need you here to help lift and move tables and stuff."

Luke nodded, though he was disappointed that he wouldn't have the chance to slip from the craziness for a while."

Growing tired of being stuck in the car, and the lack of attention he was receiving, Andy put the volume up another notch while kicking his car seat.

Lorelai closed her eyes while putting her hand to her forehead. "I know he's tired, he just won't sleep."

"Then screw it for today, and give him the damn binky."

"Luke," Lorelai warned.

"He won't sleep without it. We give it to him, he'll sleep. We don't, he'll be like this all day."

Lorelai frowned further while opening her eyes to look at the rear view mirror. Andy was crying, his face red as he pulled at the straps over his chest.

"There's one at the house, in my top drawer," she murmured.

"I got one in the truck."

"You kept one?"

"You did too," Luke said defensively.

Lorelai sighed in relent. "Give it to him. "

Luke nodded while hurrying to pluck his angry son from his seat. Lorelai watched through the windshield as Luke popped up beside Rory, who was unloading decorations from the bed of the truck. Luke pulled Andy's stroller from the mess of Toy Story paraphernalia, strapped him in, flew to the driver's seat, then came not a second later with a red binky in his hand.

Lorelai wanted to yell for Luke to stop, throw the pacifier away, but her crying son and pounding head and thoughts of a bad birthday party stopped her from doing so. She knew giving Andy that binky was like taking 3 steps backwards, but Lorelai convinced herself they'd deal with the repercussions tomorrow; today should be fun. She wouldn't let Andy be unhappy on his first birthday.

_X0X_

"Don't get used to that," Luke said while pushing Andy's stroller. "You're only getting that binky today 'cause it's your birthday."

Luke looked down as Andy leaned back in the stroller, his plumbed smile showing through the small plastic window as he flaunted the prize he held between a goofy grin. Luke rolled his eyes, though he couldn't help but smirk.

"Happy now, huh?"

Andy reached a dimpled finger to the tap the clear window.

"Do you know how tough were being last night? Your mom was up until 3 in the morning making you that Toy Story cake because you wouldn't' calm down. If you would've let me hold you, she would've gotten done at a decent time. I know your mom's crazy for trying to make a cake, but she wanted to do it for you. She made Rory's first birthday cake; she wanted to do yours too. Just between you and me, I'd let some other people eat it first before having any. Odds are it's inedible, but hey, you never know, right? Your mom could surprise us."

"Mama," Andy mumbled through the pacifier while looking around for Lorelai.

"Don't worry, we'll see her soon. She's setting up for your party, but we can't go 'till you nap first. You've hardly been sleeping this whole week," Luke said through a sigh. "I know it's our fault for giving that stupid thing to you so much, but you need to let it go, okay? Or at least let me deal with you at night. Your mom needs a break."

Keeping his eyes on Luke, Andy widened his smile.

"Now that you got it, you're not gonna give back, are you?"

Andy didn't a say word, but the devious glint in his eyes that reminded Luke so much of the spark in Lorelai's blue orbs told him that it would be a battle when it came time to get that pacifier back.

"You're dealing with me, tonight. Your mom needs a full night's sleep."

"Mama," Andy breathed while clamping his hand over the pacifier, holding it firmly in his mouth.

Luke frowned, the curve of his lips filled with worry.

_XOX_

_Patty's _

"Oh, Sookie, good, you're here."

"Yes I am, and I've got enough food to feed an army, so let's get this show on the road!" the chef boosted while coming into the room with stacks of trays to her chest.

Lorelai smiled as she pushed Andy's diaper bag and her purse to the corner of the room.

"I have to go pick up Mia from the airport. Think you guys can hold down the fort 'till I get back?"

Sookie nodded while setting the food down on one of the tables.

Lorelai turned to Rory and asked, "You'll help Sookie bring the stuff in?"

Rory nodded.

"Okay, good. Luke'll be back soon to move and rearrange. He's taking Andy for a walk, trying to get him to snooze," Lorelai explained while putting her coat on.

"How's operation Kill Binky going?"

"Don't ask."

"Ah."

"Yup. If it wasn't for the 10 cups of coffee I had this morning, I wouldn't' be awake and functioning right now. Praise the Lord for caffeine."

"Amen, sister!"

Lorelai laughed a little. "I'll be back."

_XOX_

After circling the town, Luke arrived back at Patty's with Andy fast asleep in his stroller. With his brows thoughtfully, Luke debated pulling the binky that hung loose from Andy's mouth, but quickly he expelled the thought; he didn't want to risk waking the boy up with his party just an hour away. The day meant too much for it to go wrong.

"It's yours for now," Luke warned in a faint whisper as he very carefully adjusted the fleece blanket that he had wrapped around his son. Like Lorelai, Andy was a light sleeper. A very light sleeper. Many moons ago, Luke learned that the hard way.

_A week had come and gone since Andy was born. Having used the morning to plan and Rory's heartbreaking pout to execute, Luke and his step- daughter convinced Lorelai to take the afternoon off. Rory enticed her mother with thoughts of mani/pedis and a run to Starbucks. Lorelai's eyes widened at the thought, but then her newborn son made the slightest peep and she shook her head. _

"_No, no! Don't' look!" Rory exclaimed while jumping from her seat to block Andy from Lorelai's view. _

"_But he needs me," Lorelai argued. "Well, he needs my utters," she said through a frown while peaking down at her chest. _

"_Do you have to call them that?" Luke grumped. _

"_You need me here. The place is a mess. Laundry needs to be done, dishes need to be unloaded, the living room needs to be vacuumed."_

"_You don't do any of that."_

"_Someone needs to watch the baby while you run around cleaning like a mad man. We can't tag team if I'm not here."_

"_So I'll clean while he sleeps," Luke reasoned through a shrug. _

"_But-"_

"_No buts."_

"_We're going, mom. Now go change into sweats that aren't stained in milk and spit up."_

_XOX_

_30 minutes later, the girls were gone. _

_With the help of pumped breast milk, a binky, and an Elmo music box, Andy was off to dreamland not 20 minutes after his mom and sister left. _

"_Night, little man," Luke whispered to his boy who had fallen asleep on the living room rug. _

_With a content smile on his face, Luke stood erect. He clasped his hands together, then surveyed the room to organize his plan of stack. He decided he'd tackle the kitchen first, and then circle his way back to the living room. _

_His plan came to a crashing halt not two minutes later. _

_On his way to the kitchen, Luke picked up odds and ends that scattered the floor. He dumped the items on the kitchen table, and then went to the dishwasher. He opened the door. He pulled out the upper rack. He pulled out the upper rack a little too hard. Glasses clanked together. A long spatula fell between the rack and hit the floor. Crying filled the next room in an instant. And just like that, Luke's afternoon spun out of control. He couldn't' get Andy back to sleep. When Lorelai and Rory came home nearly two hours later, they found a very flustered Luke walking through the messy house with a crying newborn to his chest. _

_Luke couldn't get Lorelai to leave the house for a month. _

Coming back to the present, Luke folded his arms over his chest while looking down at Andy. "Won't make that mistake again."

"Well, well, look who it is. The tall handsome man from Hartford."

Luke turned to find Patty leaning against the doorway of her dance studio with a smitten smile lighting her face. His eyes then swiveled to the street, and just as he expected, there was Emily and Richard Gilmore emerging from the man's shiny, black Jaguar.

"Patty, can you tell Lorelai her parents are here?"

"She's at the airport, sweetheart," Patty reported, her eyes, Luke guessed, glued to Richard.

"Damn," Luke murmured. "Forgot about that. Gotta face the Gilmores' alone."

"Good afternoon, Luke."

Luke quickly put a polite smile to his face to greet his mother-in-law. "Good afternoon, Emily."

While walking closer with Richard just behind her, Luke frowned in panic at Emily's growing stern frown.

"It's the dead of winter, Luke. Don't you think you should wait for more pleasant weather to take your one year old outside? He wouldn't need that heavy blanket if you would let him nap indoors where there's heat to keep him warm. It's almost as if you're begging for him to get sick. Does Lorelai know you have him outside?"

Keeping his composure intact, Luke gestured to the dance studio and said, "Why don't you go inside, Emily. We'll be right in."

Emily lifted her chin, and then headed inside. Richard merely spared Luke a fleeting frown of disapproval before following his wife.

Luke sighed while looking down at Andy and saying, "If you know what's good for you, you'll stay sleeping," he said before trying to carefully scoop his son from the stroller. Of course his efforts were fruitless; Andy woke at the first jostle. Plus, to make matters worse, as Luke lifted the boy to his chest, the binky fell to the floor. That's when the crying started.

"I got it!" Jess called.

Luke looked up and was grateful to find his nephew hurrying across the street.

"Thought you had to work. You said you weren't coming 'till later."

"Here's your plug," Jess aid while sticking the pacifier in his cousin's mouth. "Got off early."

"Good. You can help me move crap."

"Hey, wait a second, if I wanted to do more labor, I would've stayed at the store, where I get paid to work a forklift."

"You won't be working a forklift. Just your arms."

Jess sighed, but nonetheless he followed his uncle.

_XOX_

_Airport_

Upon arrival, Mia Holloway was happy as a clam as she walked through Hartford International Airport. The day was Andy's first birthday, and with not having seen the boy since before Thanksgiving, she was eager to celebrate the day, to see how much he's grown. She was glad to be on her way back to her hometown. But when Mia turned the corner to baggage claim and spotted Lorelai leaning against the wall with a look of exhaustion on her face, Mia's smile vanished, and a worrisome frown took it's place.

"Hey, Mia," Lorelai said while pushing from the wall.

"What's wrong?"

"What?"

"That look on your face, it's the same one you had when you moved to the Inn and you couldn't get Rory to sleep. Poor thing, she wasn't used to a new place, and for weeks you walked around like a zombie. Now tell me what's wrong," Mia demanded.

Lorelai smiled, the move barely curving her cheeks. "You know me too well, Mia."

"And you're having problems. Barely 30 and you've got dark circles under your eyes. You're too young for that. Why haven't you been sleeping?"

Lorelai frowned while touching her finger beneath her eye. She thought she globed on enough consular to hide the evidence of her ongoing lack of Z's.

"If you don't tell me, I'll just ask Lucas."

Lorelai sighed. "If I tell you, you'll just worry. But there's nothing to worry about."

"If there's nothing to worry about, I won't worry," Mia reasoned logically. "Now tell me."

_XOX_

"Oh, for heavens sake, those damn doctors."

"Mia!" Lorelai exclaimed through a grin, her tone scandalous.

"Well, they should all be damned. They don't have a clue of what they're talking about. No one says a word if a child spends hours at their mother's breast, but if it's a pacifier in their mouth, then people have something to say. Or even a bottle. There's nothing wrong with a baby walking around with a bottle all day. Don't listen to that ignorant doctor. If Andy wants a binky, give him a binky. It won't hurt him," Mia said with authority.

"You sound like Will."

"I'll bet Lucas doesn't see good reason to take it away either."

Lorelai frowned while keeping focus on the road.

"He's not getting sleep, you're not getting sleep, Luke's not getting

sleep. The noise probably keeps Rory awake too. Taking his binky away is only doing more harm than good. You need to stop this so everyone can get some rest. If you look this worn out, I can only imagine how Luke looks."

"It doesn't matter," Luke argued softly. "He's not talking enough, Mia. If the Binky isn't the problem, then we have to look more into this… I just, I don't know, I'm worried, Mia. I want him to be normal. I want my baby to be okay. I don't want him to struggle so soon. He's only a baby," Lorelai explained, the words pleading.

Mia's firm stance softened as she briefly met Lorelai's gaze before the Gilmore looked back to the windshield.

"He'll talk when he's ready. Even if he's a few steps behind, he'll talk when it's his time."

"He understands so much, Mia, he's so smart. He just isn't very vocal."

"Lorelai, it's okay. I know. But you need to trust me when I say he'll be okay. Do you trust me?"

"Of course I trust you, but-"

"No buts. Do you trust me?"

"Yes."

"Then I want you, just for a second, to forget about what the doctor said, and think about what you feel is right. You know what's best for you son better than anyone in this world, even Luke, and especially better than a man who sees different children everyday. What do you think is the right thing to do?"

Lorelai admitted she didn't know.

"Do you remember when it took months for Rory to learn how to a ride a bike?"

Lorelai nodded. "4 months."

"That's right, 4 months. Some would say that's longer than the norm. But did you do anything differently? No. And now look at her. Healthy and happy and on her way to Harvard."

Lorelai couldn't help but smile at the thought. She always wanted her daughter to go to Harvard.

"Now what do you think you should do?"

Lorelai was quiet for a moment before saying, "He is only a year old. Rory had the pacifier until she was older than 2," the words thoughtful.

"And how did you get her to give it up?" Mia asked through knowing smile.

"It just kind of happened. Over time, as she got older, she stopped asking for it, she stopped needing it, and I stopped buying more."

"Yes, she stopped when she was ready," Mia summed up.

"Yeah," Lorelai murmured. "But Mia, I can't just ignore what the doctor said. I mean he's a professional; he knows what he's talking about. I have to do something."

"Alright, fine," Mia gave in. "Maybe the man does know a thing or 2, but you're a mother. You know plenty, more than he does. I think you should be listening to what those motherly instincts are telling you to do."

"I gave in today," Lorelai confessed. "I barely got any sleep last night; bed time has been so difficult. Andy is beyond stubborn. He won't even lie down sometimes without that damn pacifier. Luke and I are stressed and frustrated and tired and Andy has been so cranky and not sleeping and we just gave in. I don't want him to be upset today; I want him to have a good birthday. It calmed him down a little, but I know he's tired too. I'm hoping he gives in to sleep. He needs a good nap."

"Good, he should be happy on his birthday."

"Yeah," Lorelai agreed.

A moment of silence passed before Lorelai murmured the words, "Maybe we don't quit this cold turkey. Maybe we just start with the days, let him have a binky at night. I mean, I don't know, maybe Luke is right. He wouldn't talk at night, anyway- no one does, not unless they're dreaming or sleep walking or hallucinating or something. It can't hurt if he has it at night, right?" Lorelai asked, her brief glance in Mia's direction begging for reassurance.

Mia smiled. "I don't think it could. But sweetheart, I want you to do what you think is right. But I will say, I don't' like seeing you this way. All this stress is weighing down on you. You're worrying too much over that little boy. You're going to drive yourself to a face full of wrinkles at a young age if you don't relax."

"Oh, Mia, I have a teenage daughter on her way to college and son whose going mobile. The time to relax has long come and gone."

Mia smirked.

_XOX_

"The grandparents are here! The party can start now!" Will exclaimed.

Val rolled her eyes while walking into Patty's with a tray of her famous cheesecake in her hands.

"Sorry. The other set beat you here," Jess said in passing.

Val turned to watch as her eldest grandson carried her youngest to a yoga mat. He held Andy far from his body, like he was carrying a ticking time bomb.

"Damn, they beat us here," Will cursed while coming up behind Val.

"Not so loud," Val warned while putting the cheesecake beside the covered birthday cake and various trays of different cookies made ala Sookie.

"Oh, they're on the other side of the room. They can't hear me," Will waved off.

"You cause any trouble today, and you're sleeping on the couch for a month," Val warned before turning from her husband. She walked the length of the room, giving Luke and Sookie smiles as she passed them. She couldn't help a grin when she passed Jess who was squatted in front of Andy, changing the boy's stinky diaper.

"Shoulda stayed at work," Val heard Jess mumble as he struggled to clean Andy.

"One day you'll be doing that for your own baby. It's good you get the practice in."

"Nope. No kids for me."

Val smiled while continuing on her journey to Emily and Richard, who were seated at the far table-one of the few that were set up.

"Hey you two. It's been a while. We haven't seen you since Thanksgiving dinner at the Inn."

"Yes, well we had Christmas plans that couldn't be altered," Emily said.

Val nodded in understanding, though how a grandparent could miss their grand-baby's first Christmas, she couldn't' comprehend.

"Lorelai should be back any minute. She'll be glad to see you came."

"Of course we came."

Val smiled. "Richard, do you think you can help Will? Luke has him moving chairs."

Richard gave a nod while standing from his chair. When he got to his feet, he buttoned his perfectly pressed jacket while promising his wife he'd be back.

Val took the newly vacated seat next to Emily.

"I hope you don't mind, but the party is starting soon, and the more men to help, the faster everything gets setup."

Emily nodded, "You know, I could've found an excellent caterer and party host to arrange everything so they wouldn't' have to set up last minute like they are."

"Oh, we don't need caterers; we have Sookie," Val dismissed. "Plus it's good they move around heavy objects every now and then. Let's them feel all big and strong, like they wear the pants in the relationship. Best to leave the men to their illusions every now and again."

Emily smiled and Val would swear the curve of her lips was genuine.

"So, before the party starts, I wanted to let you in on the surprise Will and I are planning for the kids."

"Oh?" Emily inquired.

"I know it's the baby's birthday, but I thought his parents deserve a little break. Why not celebrate surviving year one is how I see it."

Emily smiled a bit further.

"Will and I have a little cabin about an hour from here, at Bolton Lake. We think it will be good for Luke and Lorelai to spend a weekend away from everything. Of course we'd take Andy and Rory while they're away. Will's so excited to have his grand-kids over for a weekend. He likes to spoil them beyond belief. Anyway, you and Richard are more than welcome to come by. You can even stay over. It could be grandparents weekend," Val advertised through a smile.

The thought caught Emily's curiosity, thought her face didn't give her interest away.

"We want to send them soon, before the novelty wears off. The second week of February is what Will and I are hoping for. Rory will be on break from school, so she won't be buried in homework. I'd love to spend some time actually doing something with her, rather than watching her study."

"It's important she stay dedicated to her schooling," Emily argued, her tone slightly defensive. "She won't get into Harvard unless she stays focused."

"Oh, nothing will stop her from getting into Harvard. I just hate that I hardly have any fun with her anymore. She's so absorbed in school, and don't get me wrong, I'm glad she's driven, but I just miss her younger days. Stars Hollow Elementary school has a much lighter workload than Chilton. I got a lot more time with her before she went and grew up. I begged her not to, but she's just as stubborn as her mother and didn't listen."

Emily barely nodded.

"Anyway, we're gonna let the kids in on the surprise today, and hopefully they'll pick a date. If it works with your schedule, like I said, you're more than welcome to visit."

"Thank you, we'll keep that mind," Emily promised her face neutral.

Val gave a nodding smile before standing from her seat.

_XOX_

"Now how in the heck did we beat you to your own party?"

Lorelai smiled while coming from her jeep as Buddy and Maisy were heading up the stairs to Patty's, both holding sturdy looking gifts.

"It's not my party; it's Andy's party," Lorelai corrected as she popped open the trunk.

"You're throwing the shindig, aren't ya?"

"I do believe I am," Lorelai said thoughtfully. Mia stood off to the side, wearing a smile as she watched the scene. "And I also believe that the two of you missed the last family dinner. I'm still not over those two empty chairs that were starring me in the face, begging to know where you were. I don't know how long it will be until I can forgive you. Presents may help though. Hint, hint."

Maisy rolled her eyes while Buddy frowned.

"I wanted to get you something, but the misses wouldn't let me," Buddy said while pointing his thumb at Maisy.

"We spent our money on Andy. It's his birthday, isn't it?"

Lorelai gave a dramatic sigh while stepping to the sidewalk with a bag of presents from Mia. "Fine, short stuff can have all the gifts, but lets not forget whose birthday is in March."

"I'm sure you wouldn't dream of letting us forget," Mia said through a smile.

"I'll remind you all everyday. I'll be just like those parrots who repeat the same things over and over again. I'll be so annoying, you'll have no choice but to remember," Lorelai said before crossing into Patty's, the studio transformed to all things Toy Story as bodies and music filled the room.

"Okay, appetizers are on the first table to your right, entrées on the next and deserts on the far table across from the stereo!" Sookie's voice shouted as she finished putting all the food on display.

Lorelai's brows knit in wonder as she scanned the guests for Luke, though her search didn't carry on very long before she felt a tug at her pants. When she looked down, her eyes lit with excitement at her smiling boy.

"Look at him, Mais, he's good and sturdy," Buddy said.

"He eats like me, right baby?" Lorelai said with pride. "Just don't get too big, okay? I like you a little chubby, but if you go gettin' fat your mean daddy will blame me for the whole being unhealthy thing, and I'll never hear the end of it."

"He's perfect," Mia countered. "Now if I could have a kiss, I'll go make my rounds. It feels like it's been ages since I've seen everyone."

Lorelai took the hint as she turned to hold Andy in the air.

"Oh, that smile melts my heart every time, even when I see it in pictures," Mia gushed with her hand to her chest in adoration.

"Makes him look all sweet and innocent, doesn't it? Well, don't let the smile fool you; his hissy fits may not match Damian's, but he can throw World Series level tantrums with the best of 'em."

Mia smiled after putting a kiss to Andy's cheek. "He does have your devious grin."

"And my healthy appetite- or unhealthy, depending on how you look at it. I've created quite the spawn, haven't I?"

"Maybe the next one'll eat like Luke," Maisy said through a shrug.

"Ugh," Lorelai groaned. "Not you too."

"What?"

Lorelai shook her head. "I better circulate with the birthday boy before someone, aka, Emily, yells at me. I'm sure she's around here looking for a slightly deflated balloon, or fallen streamer, or crocked tablecloth to nail me with. Come on, big boy, let's go see everyone," Lorelai said before getting swallowed by the crowd.

Following suit, Mia ventured into the party to great everyone while Buddy and Maisy spotted Val at a table.

"Stop flirting with other men," Will growled while pulling Val closer.

"I was just trying to get their attention."

"Well, don't smile like that."

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Just don't smile."

Val grinned further before putting a quick kiss to her husband's grey prickly cheek.

"There she is!" Buddy boosted. "My second favorite girl in the world."

"Hey," Will warned. "Eyes on your own wife."

"Yeah, eyes on your own wife," Maisy echoed while taking a seat.

"I've had my eyes on you for decades; I can't even look at other girls every now and then?"

"Not one as pretty as her. Find an ugly girl to look at."

"I don't want an ugly girl," Buddy sulked.

"Then you're stuck with me. Not will ya sit down?"

Buddy sighed while taking the seat next to his wife.

With a soft smile on her face, Val leaned into Will's side, his arm around her shoulder as she put her head to his chest.

"So, how was your anniversary?"

"Same old," Maisy said through a shrug. "This one doesn't have a romantic bone left in his body."

"Hey, I made you breakfast in bed, didn't I?"

"Had it ready when she woke up?" Will asked.

"Yes I did," Buddy said triumphantly. "Even gave her a rose."

Maisy smiled a little. "So you did breakfast right," she gave in.

"Gotta do breakfast right," Will said before leaving a kiss to his wife's temple.

Val smiled further.

_XOX_

The party was in full swing when more than an hour had come and gone. Appetizers had been cleared from serving plates when 2:00 rolled around, and Sookie announced that it was time for lunch.

"First on line, huh?"

"I am a Gilmore, aren't I?"

"Thought you were a Danes."

"I'm both.

"But when it comes to food, you're all Gilmore," Jess finished.

Rory looked to her left to give a prim smile while grabbing a plate and zeroing in on the penne.

"So, how are things?"

"What things?"

"You know… things."

While scooping a heaping spoonful of pasta to her plate, Rory said, "Things are fine."

"Fine is code for crap fest."

Rory shrugged while keeping her focus on the food.

"Let me guess- you've been burying yourself in homework to keep busy."

"So what if I have?" Rory snapped defensively. "It's a lot of work, and if I don't keep up with it I won't get into Harvard."

"You're going to Harvard, no questions asked."

"Not if I don't get in. And I won't get in if I fall behind," Rory said while moving down the line, grabbing spoonfuls of side dishes as she went.

"Would it kill you to take a day off?"

"Yes."

"You took today off."

"It's my little brother's birthday; of course I wouldn't miss it."

"Saturday, ditch the textbooks for two hours."

"Why?"

"You'll see."

"See what?"

"Be ready for 7:00," Jess said before parting from the line.

"Hey, wait, no, I didn't agree to anything!"

"I'm picking you up at 7:00!" Jess shouted without turning back.

Rory blew a frustrated breath while looking to her plate and angrily dumping a scoop of mashed potatoes to her nearly full plate.

Meanwhile, after taking Andy around the room for another go, Luke frowned when he found Lorelai at the table, her head resting on her folded arms that sat on the surface.

"Mama!" Andy called happily while looking to his father as he pointed to his mom.

Lorelai rolled her head to show her tired smile.

"You know they put the food out, right?"

Lorelai nodded a bit.

"Want me to get you something?"

Lorelai shook her head.

With concern on his face, Luke lowered himself to the seat beside his wife while hooking Andy over his knee.

Lorelai smiled further as she reached to tip up the little cowboy hate Andy wore. Covering his body was a buzz themed outfit while on his feet were cowboy boots.

"My weird little space cowboy," Lorelai murmured.

"Come're."

Lorelai groaned while sitting up right before falling to Luke's chest. She rested her forehead to the crock of Luke's neck as he put a kiss to the top of her head and wrapped his arm around her waist.

"I'm doing tonight," Luke said, his voice low. "He'll tough it out and deal with me. You need sleep."

"There wont' be anything to deal with."

"What?"

"I talked to Mia. I think we should let him have the binky at night. You're right; he doesn't talk while he's asleep anyway, and he's still a baby. I don't think we should take it away from him completely. I hate that he's been having bad nights because of it. The fact that he isn't sleeping well worries me too. So unless things get worse, I think it'll be okay if he has it during the night."

"What I said in the first place," Luke mumbled.

"I know," Lorelai murmured while picking at one of the buttons on Luke's open flannel. "How you holding up?"

"Fine," Luke answered. "It's you I'm worried about."

"You didn't get much sleep either."

"Like I said, it's you I'm worried about. He turns into a mama's boy at night. He won't let me go near him."

Lorelai smiled a little while looking up to Andy who was playing with a buzz toy he plucked from the table.

"He gets like that when he's sick too. I'm sure it's nothing personal. He still loves daddy, don't you, little boy?"

"Da," Andy said while turning to show Luke a toothy grin.

Luke couldn't' help but smile.

_XOX_

After lunch, Kirk and Joe struggled for nearly 20 minutes trying to set up a projector, but finally, just as the crowd was growing restless, Kirk announced it was ready and Joe flipped the lights.

"Oh, I've been waiting for this all day," Val said through a smile as the movie kicked up.

"Me too," Lorelai confessed from beside her mother-in-law.

"Lorelai," an impatient voice called.

Lorelai sprang up to find her mother standing just behind her.

"Be right back," she whispered to Val before ushering her mom to the side.

"Your father and I are leaving."

"Already?" Lorelai asked. "It' just about desert time, and we haven't even done presents yet."

"Your father has to board a plane in two hours. As it is, we've stayed too long."

"Business trip?"

"He'll be gone for nearly two weeks."

Lorelai frowned. "That must be hard, not having dad around for that long."

"It is what it is," Emily said indifferently while adjusting her purse strap over her shoulder.

Lorelai took the hint to change the subject. "Did you guys have a good time?"

Emily nodded. "The food was wonderful."

"I'll let Sookie know you think so. She made everything. Well, everything but the cake. I had to fight her and Luke tooth and nail on that. They were dead set against letting me do it. They didn't think I could pull it off."

"You made a cake?" Emily asked in surprise.

"Yes I did. We all may get violently ill after eating it and it bares only the slightest resemblance to the picture, but I made a cake."

Emily smiled a little. "I'm sure it will be fine."

"Are you sure you don't want to stay to find out? I can take you home later since dad has to go," Lorelai offered.

Emily considered the notion for a fleeting moment. Lorelai thought, just for a second, that her mother would say yes when suddenly she shook her head and said, "I have a million things to do. Aside from Wednesday's D.A.R meeting I have to prepare for, I've got a charity dinner I'm co-hosting and there's still last minute planning to be done."

"Okay," Lorelai said through a nod. "Thanks for coming."

Emily nodded. "Of course."

Though Emily wanted to stay to watch her grandson eat his first birthday cake and open his presents, she already felt out of place at the party and that was with her husband by her side. She didn't like the discomfort she felt in having to watch Andy behave so well with his other grandparents when he hardly allowed her to even hold him. Though seeing that didn't sting as much as seeing the relationship Andy shared with Buddy and Maisy- people he had no blood relation with.

"Did you say goodbye to Andy? I can grab him from Patty."

"No, that's alright. Your father and I said goodbye."

"Okay, good. Drive safe."

Emily nodded before turning to leave.

Lorelai sighed a tiny, barely audible breath while going back to her seat for the movie.

"At least they came."

Lorelai nodded at Val's words.

With her eyes on the movie, Val reached for Lorelai's hand to give it a reassuring squeeze.

"Your dad peaked at the envelope they left. I told him not to, but we all know boys don't listen very well."

The corner of Lorelai's lips tugged to a small smile.

"They left a check big enough to get Andy through the next ten years."

"I'm not surprised. That's how my parents work. They write big checks like it's no big deal to give away a crap load of money, and they think that's enough to make up for not spending time with their grandson," Lorelai said, her eyes on Andy as the boy was being passed from Patty to Babette.

"I don't think they mean to use money as a replacement for quality time."

"Whether they mean it or not that's the impression they give off."

Val frowned. She wasn't aiming for this reaction when she brought up the money. So instead she tried a different approach.

"I know Luke will insist on saving the money away for a rainy day, but what do you say we sneak some and take the kids on a shopping spree. Maybe we can even get Jess to come with us."

Lorelai thought for a moment and said, "It would be cute to watch Andy run loose in Toys R Us.

Val nodded eagerly while smiling.

"And Rory's always looking for new books. So is Jess."

Val squeezed Lorelai's hand in excitement. "We'll go next Sunday, when you're not working. We can shop all day, then go home, curl pu by the fire place, order some Chinese, and watch Toy Story 2."

Lorelai rolled her eyes but a grinning smile took her face.

"I have to see the 2nd one if I'm watching the 1st one," Val reasoned.

"Yeah, yeah," Lorelai said while resting her temple to Val's shoulder.

Val flashed a winning smile before kissing Lorelai's head, then looking back to the movie.

_XOX_

"Okay, last one, and it's big!" Lorelai announced to the room.

"Gonna need a U-haul to get all that crap home," Jess snickered at the pile of presents, the mountain rivaling Everest.

"Gonna need a second house."

"Wait 'till you see this one."

"What? Why? What is it?" Luke asked in near panic.

"It's from Patty; hers is the only one left. I helped her carry it inside yesterday."

"What is it?" Luke demanded.

"Watch."

Releasing an impatient huff, Luke turned back to watch as Lorleai helped Andy tear through the wrapping that covered his last gift.

"Oh my God!" Lorelai screamed.

"Oh God," Luke groaned.

"Baby's first drum set," Jess said through a gloating smile once the present was revealed.

Luke glared at his nephew in passing before coming up behind Lorelai who was busy spurring their son's claps on, his excitement gaining cheers and whistles from the room.

"It's going back," Luke practically hissed.

"Maybe in your dreams," Lorelai scoffed. "I've always wanted a drum set, but my parents never let me get one. They never got me that pony I wanted either."

"No pony," Luke said firmly.

"Look at it, it's got symbols and everything!" Buddy boosted.

Luke looked up, a deep, worrisome frown on his face as he watched Buddy kneeling over the gift.

"Now all we need is a little guitar and a microphone and you can start up your own band," Lorelai said.

"I'll get him the guitar, sugah!" Babette yelled.

"Oh, oh, I'll get him the microphone!" Sookie volunteered.

"And mommy will make up fliers that we can take around the park to pass out to all the other babies. You'll have your own pint size band in no time," Lorelai promised, her adoring eyes glued to Andy as he played with Buddy.

"And I'll buy you some ear plugs, Lucas."

Luke turned to show Mia his frown who couldn't help but give a sympathetic smile.

_XOX_

"What a day, huh?" Lorelai asked, her voice loaded with exhaustion as she climbed the stairs.

"Long, long day," Rory agreed.

Lorelai smiled while wrapping her arms around Rory's shoulder. "You hittin' the sac?"

Rory nodded.

"Alright, babe, I'll see you in the morning."

After receiving a good night kiss on the cheek, Rory headed to her room for the night while Lorelai rounded the stairs.

"I know what you're thinking," Lorelai whispered while running her fingers through Andy's bright brown hair. "But daddy and I decided you can hang onto your binky at bed time."

Lorelai peaked down at the baby while turning to the nursery to discover that Andy had fallen asleep. Snapping a wince to her face, Lorelai held her breath while lowering Andy to his crib. He most always woke during the dreaded transfer. But after Andy settled to the mattress with nothing but a sigh escaping his lips, Lorelai looked up to thank God.

When Lorelai looked back down to see that the binky was barely an inch from falling to the bed, she thought about taking it, figuring it would be gone from his mouth soon enough. But after a long, fun day, Lorelai didn't want it to end in tears and screams, though it did appear that Andy was down for the count. She debated back and forth for a minute before deciding to leave well enough alone. Before remembering her conversation with Mia.

After pulling the string of Andy's Red Sox nightlight, Lorelai slipped from the room to run into Luke.

"Truck in the garage?"

Luke nodded. "I'll bring the presents in tomorrow."

Lorelai nodded while leading the way to their bedroom. "I have to work late tomorrow. Some crazy lady scheduled a staff meeting during prime time."

"You the crazy lady?"

"Yup."

Luke gave a tired smile while stopping at his dresser to unload his hat and watch in exchange for a shirt and sweats.

"So was it worth it?" Lorelai asked while falling to the bed, her eyes on Luke as he changed.

"Looked like Andy had a good time."

"And that makes it all worth it," Lorelai finished.

"Yeah. Coulda done without the drum set though. What the hell was Patty thinking?"

Lorelai shrugged. "The woman's a dance teacher; music's in her blood."

"Yeah, well, it's not in Andy's."

"I know you have big plans for him to be a Red Sox pitcher."

"Ace of the starting rotation is what he'll be."

"But he may not like it. He may not be any good at it. Let's not forget he's got Gilmore in him too, and Gilmore's suck at sports. No amount of macho man training can erase that."

"We'll see," Luke countered while padding his way to the bathroom to brush his teeth.

"Gonna be a long 17 years," Lorelai murmured while tugging her jeans from her legs.

When Luke returned from the bathroom, Lorelai was lying on the bed in nothing but a pair of boy shorts. His eyes widened and his stare flew to her chest. The heat wasn't on; the cold air creating a visual to Luke's pleasing.

"Babe, I love that you still like to ogle me, but I'm freezing my ass off. Shirt, please," she begged while holding her arms out.

Luke shook his stare away and quickly he went to the closet to pull his blue flannel from its hanger.

"Thank you," Lorelai said greatly while snatching the flannel and wrapping the material around her body. "Sorry if I made you think you were gettin' some. I'm too tired to do anything but sleep."

Luke frowned.

Lorelai smiled at his fallen face. "Tuesday, you, me, sex. Sound good?"

Luke nodded, a tiny spark lighting his tired gaze at the thought.

"Guess I don't have to ask if you wanna go."

"Go where?" Luke asked while getting into bed.

"The cabin. I can't believe your parents offered to take the kids for the weekend. Your mom should know better. I've told her enough bedtime horror stories that I thought I scared her away from wanting to take Andy over night."

"He wasn't so bad before all this."

"He's had his hissy moments. He's just not a good sleeper, which is surprising since his daddy sleeps like the dead."

"Once I'm out, I'm out."

"Don't I know it."

Luke smiled while settling back against the pillow that he propped to the headboard.

"My dad can run the store for the weekend. And we can give Rory some money to help out with Andy. She wont' take it, but we can offer."

"Look at you trying to plan a romantic getaway with your wife."

"Been a while since I've had you to myself," Luke justified gruffly.

"Miss me, huh?"

"Yup."

Lorelai smiled further. "They probably wouldn't let us say no if we tried."

"That mean we're going?"

Lorelai thought for a minute before giving Luke a nod. "We're going."

"Good. And don't waste your time packing," he said before tugging at her flannel sleeve. "You won't be wearing more than this."

_TBC…_

**Review? Please, and thank you! Hope you enjoyed, :D. **


	4. The Good, The Bad, The Jealous

So, finally I find a beta reader, but still, I'm flying solo on this one. : (

Anyway, thank you, thank you, thank you everyone for the lovely reviews!

Enjoy! Read on!

**Smug Marrieds & Jam Hands**

**Chapter Four: The Good, The Bad, The Jealous**

_Saturday_

_Luke's Diner_

"Oh, Will, when will this jealousy end?"

"I do the books, don't I? Only thing he does is take orders."

"You _help_ with the books. And he cooks."

"Only when you're not around," the man grumped.

With a soft smile, Valerie pulled out the chair next to Will's. She put her hand to her husband's shoulder and met his eyes. "It's not Luke's fault the Hardware store went under, and you know that. People fix something once and it usually stays fixed. In a small town like this, there just aren't enough people to keep a store like that running. I know you're bumped because it's been a year, but I also know you're proud of your son for the job he's done."

Will sighed in relent while leaning back in his chair. "He's lucky people always gotta eat," the older man murmured.

"Yes, very lucky."

"And you know, it was Lorelai's idea to open a diner, not Luke's. She should get the credit. You know what would-a happened to this place if she didn't come up with that? Well, I'll tell ya. It'd be all boarded up and we would-a lost the house. We'd be living with the kids if she didn't come up with that idea."

Val rolled her eyes while standing from her chair. She knew her husband was too competitive; he had too much pride to admit defeat to his son.

"Call him, congratulate him on a year. And make sure he reminds Lorelai about tomorrow. I'm picking them up at 12:00," Val warned while plucking the phone from the counter and handing it to Will. "And don't you forget you agreed to run things around here tomorrow. Caesar won't be in until lunch; you'll be alone for the morning. Are you gonna be okay on your own? You can always ask Luke to come in for the morning."

"Hey, I don't need him to come in!" Will argued defensively. "I keep business going better than he can!

"Okay, okay," Val gave in while throwing her hands up in surrender. "I'll be upstairs. Call him," she said before disappearing behind the curtain that led to the office.

With his brows furrowed and his feelings reluctant, Will dialed the familiar number. "Should be calling Lorelai," he mumbled.

_Dooses Market_

One of the perks of owning your own business meant flexibility. Luke knew this first hand. It's what allowed him to be at the market every Saturday morning with his son.

Luke owned the land beneath the diner, and the diner itself. Will was resistant when it came time to hand over ownership, but the Hardware store sunk to the ground and he had no choice. At first, Will thought of turning the place into a fishing or camping store, but quickly both notions were thrown out the window. Anything of the sort would fall faster than the Hardware store did. Years of medical bills and a shaky business eventually caught up with the Danes family. Nearly six months before Andy was born, a family meeting was set. Ideas were tossed back and forth when Lorelai came up with the diner. Will hated the idea. He hated cooking. Val jumped at the thought. Lorelai pushed it through. Luke could cook; he learned from his mom while growing up. The idea of fresh pie and her hubby's coffee at home and right in the center of town was very appealing to Lorelai. Even though he was weary of starting his own business, Luke agreed. Val eventually convinced Will to take retirement. They lived off those funds and worked in the diner when they could to fill in the gaps. Val didn't care that her son signed her paychecks. Will narrowed his eyes every time Luke stood with a gloating smile as he did payroll.

About a month and a half before Andy was born, the diner opened. The new business flourished immediately. Things were good. It wasn't long before Luke could release the huge breath of air he'd been holding. At first, he was working 7 days a week, but made sure to be home for dinner to be with his growing family. When Lorelai went back to the Inn, schedules had to be revised, but Luke was hesitant about cutting his hours.

"_It's your name on the window, honey. You have a wife and kids at home. You have a new baby. You don't need to be here everyday. Your father and I can handle things when you're not around. Take a day off. Be crazy and take two days off. Jess can work after school. He's been looking for a job. You make the schedule the way you need it, and we'll work around it."_

That's what Valerie said to Luke when she found he was running himself ragged. That was when Jess lived with his grandparents and went to Stars Hollow High. Eventually he grew tired of school and tested out to get his G.E.D. He wanted more independence so he got a job outside the family name. He found an apartment that his grandparents co-signed for since he was a minor. Things were a little tight when Jess left, but then Luke found Caesar who was able to step in and fill the holes.

It took Luke a little while to find a good rhythm. He went through a few different schedules until Lorelai's settled, and then he molded his around hers to make sure someone was with Andy everyday.

"_Saturday, Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. Best I can get. I'm home Tuesday, and Sunday."_

_Luke nodded. "I'll work Tuesday and Sundays-"_

"_No," Lorelai protested. "Take Sundays off. Rory doesn't have school, I'm off. It's the only day we can all hang out together."_

_Luke nodded while writing on the piece of paper that sat on the table in front of him. "I'll work Tuesday. Home Saturday, Sunday, and Thursday. I'll have to work Monday, Wednesday, and Friday" he finished through a sigh. "Casear needs Monday and Wednesday off and I can't take more than 3 days."_

_Lorelai nodded in understanding._

"_So, you're here Saturday and Thursday. We're both here Sunday. I'm here Tuesday. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday are the problems. No one's here for Andy," Lorelai said through a frown. "I mean I guess I can talk to Mia, come back home for a while, but-"_

"_No, I know you like being there, and we need the money. We'll figure something out."_

Day care was a last, last resort, but when Val heard the trouble they were having, she offered to babysit the days, and never was day care brought up again. As Andy got older, she brought her grandson to the diner, spending time back and forth between the office and the second floor. Every now and then, Lorelai would sweep in and whisk her son away to the Inn for a few hours. The system worked. Luke liked the new routine. With Lorelai's schedule, he didn't need to change his. He had the weekends off and Saturday was kept for just father and son as Rory spent the better part of daylight hours doing homework so Sundays were most always free for family time.

"Ah, the Danes men. Right on schedule," Patty purred from the fruit stand just outside of Dooses.

"Yeah, yeah," Luke grumbled while hurrying past the dance teacher.

"Okay, hand it over," Luke said while plucking the grocery list from Andy's hand and immediately replacing it with a toy he loved.

Andy flashed a loopy smile before sticking the toy in his mouth.

Luke sighed, though he couldn't help a smile. He kissed the top of his son's head, and then put him to the ground on shaky feet. "I know you're still wobbly, but you'll never get it down if you don't' practice. Hold my hand, okay?"

Andy reached for his father's outstretched hand, wrapping his small fist around Luke's thumb.

"You got padding on your butt, so it's okay if you fall," Luke warned as they turned down the first aisle, Andy slowly toddling his way along.

"You think your mom'll notice if I forget Poptarts?"

"Ma!" Andy exclaimed while pointing to the shelf.

"Hell would freeze over first," Luke grumbled while reaching for a double box, then dumping it in the basket that hung from his arm. When he went to grab another box, his vibrating cell phone stopped him.

"Bet this is your mom. She forgot something, like she always does.

Andy let go of Luke's hand to reach for the cell phone his dad had pressed to his ear.

"What'd you forget? And if you say ice cream, forget it; there's two cartons in the freezer, Lorelai, that's enough," Luke said while trying to keep his son at bay.

"It's not Lorelai," a deep voice corrected. "I'm only calling cause your mom made me. And I'm only saying congratulations on the diner cause your mom made me. This wasn't my idea. And remind your wife about tomorrow. Bye."

Luke grinned from ear to ear while hanging up then slipping the phone in his pocket. When he looked down, he found Andy wrapped around his leg.

"Hey, you're not climbing me; I'm not a tree," Luke said while hoisting the fussy boy to his hip. "That was grandpa, not mama. You didn't miss anything."

Andy taped Luke's breast pocket where he saw the cell phone disappear to.

"You want yours? Here," Luke offered while reaching into the black diaper bag that hung from his shoulder. "No long distance calls, okay? Keep it local."

Andy snatched the plastic phone; a large smile tugging his lips as he sloppily slapped the toy to his ear.

Luke matched the boy's smile before looking back to the list. "Next we hit the vegetables. This is the week I get your mom to eat the carrots in her soup and not just the noodles."

_The Inn_

"So, remember when you said I was crazy for having a winter wedding?"

Sookie held up a quick finger as she continued counting each rotation. When the large wooden spoon she held made 100 spins around the huge silver bowl full of desert mix, she looked up to Lorelai with a smile. "Yes I do."

"Well, there's someone even crazier than me out there. I just talked to this lady, who by the way is thinner than a twig, and she wants to do the ceremony outside, by the lake."

"What? Is she nuts?"

Lorelai shrugged. "She better be wearing a thermal dress or little Miss Ultra Skinny will freeze like a popsicle. There's gonna have to be extra time between the ceremony and the reception so she can defrost."

"What if it snows?" Sookie asked through wide eyes while moving to the stovetop where the night's dinner was cooking.

"Oh, she's hoping it will. She says the snow will match the Ugg boots she plans to wear underneath her dress. It's all about the matching!" Lorelai exclaimed in a high, squeaky voice that made Sookie giggle.

Lorelai grinned while popping a tomato into her mouth.

"It was pretty when it snowed at your wedding."

"Hey, all I got was a few flurries. Flurries that we watched fall from _inside_. I can't imagine trying to plan an outdoor winter wedding. How is she gonna walk down the aisle if the lawn is buried in snow? The woman's insane."

"Did you try and talk her out of it?"

Lorelai shook her head. "I didn't feel like going 10 rounds with bridezilla."

Sookie winced. "She's one of those brides?"

"Seems like it, the way she came in here with her list of demands. And I mean literally, she has a typed and laminated list of demands," Lorelai said while pulling the proof from the folder she held.

"Holy Moly," Sookie awed while taking the paper.

"Back and front."

Sookie flipped the paper to find the back was filled with ink. "**Number 74:** **If it should snow, I want the aisle cleared four feet across, no more, no less.**"

Sookie looked up at Lorelai who had a fake smile plastered to her face.

"She sounds just delightful, doesn't she?"

"Did Michel see this?"

"Not yet."

"You're gonna show it to him, right?"

"Hoyeah. He's gotta memorize it all. The wedding's set for February 12th. Unfortunately, I won't be here."

"You won't?"

"Luke, me, cabin, weekend away."

"Oh, right."

"Yup. Can't you tell I'm just heartbroken about missing it?"

Sookie smiled. "But that's less than 3 weeks away. How's it all gonna come together so fast?"

Lorelai shrugged and said, "Someone cancelled, so she grabbed their date. She sent out invitations months ago. She said she was using this date no matter what; she just needed a place. She already ordered decorations and everything, so shouldn't be too bad."

Sookie nodded in agreement.

"Alright, I should get back out there. Michel's lunch is almost over."

"You'll call me when he comes?"

"I'm expecting a freak out of epic proportions packed with wild eyes and flaring nostrils. I wouldn't' dream of letting you miss the show."

"Can't wait!"

_XOX_

_Diner_

After stocking the fridge with new groceries, putting Andy down for a nap, paying some bills, catching up on highlights from the previous night's hockey game, and doing some laundry, it was just before 1:00 when Luke walked into the diner with a bright eyed Andy at his hip.

"Mama! Ma!" Andy shouted happily at the sight of Lorelai sitting at a table.

Lorelai looked up to show a wide smile. "Hey, big boy."

Andy twisted and turned from his father's grip as he tried to reach Lorelai.

After a moment of struggles, Luke sighed in relent while holding the boy in the air. "Take him."

Lorelai grinned while plopping Andy to her lap.

"All morning he likes me fine; he sees you and I'm chopped liver."

"No! Don't talk like that! You're not chopped liver! Tell daddy he's not chopped liver."

Andy pointed a lazy finger at Luke while falling back to Lorelai's chest.

"You were a mama's boy too when you were a baby."

From her seat across from Lorelai, Val turned to Will who stood behind the counter. "Don't' tease your son on his special day."

"Special day?" Lorelai questioned.

"It was one year ago today that the Diner opened," Val explained.

"Really?" Lorelai asked while doing the math.

"It's not a big deal," Luke dismissed.

"Most small businesses go down after two years. It's pretty big to make a year, babe. Halfway there."

Luke shrugged while popping open the coffeemaker to prepare another batch of java.

"I offered and then insisted on taking Andy for the evening so you two could have a nice, quiet, celebratory dinner, but your boring husband wanted no part of that."

"Luke!"

"What?"

"Is your ball cap on too tight? Why would you say no to that?" she demanded desperately. "Free babysitting, you were offered free babysitting, and you said no? Why! Why would you say no?"

"'Cause if I said yes, you'd just drag me to some stuffy restaurant with an overpriced menu. No thanks."

"I wanna go out!" Lorelai whined.

"My offer still stands," Valerie sang with her eyes on the magazine on the table in front of her.

"Please, please, please!" Lorleai begged through wide eyes before pulling out her heartbreaking pout.

Through furrowed brows, Luke huffed a breath.

Will smiled happily while slapping his son on the shoulder. "Better make sure your suit's clean."

_XOX_

_CrapShack_

"Rory! We're leaving!"

"Okay! Bring me leftovers!" the teen shouted from her bedroom.

"If there are any!"

"Luke! Make sure there's leftovers!"

"Yup!"

Lorelai frowned as she rounded the couch to the foyer. While plucking her coat from the rack, the front door swung open.

"Oh, hey Jess."

"Hey. Why you all dressed up? Big night out for the married folk?"

"Your uncle's taking me on a hot date."

"He look like a penguin?"

"Yup, and a mighty handsome penguin at that."

"Where's short stuff? Rory's not babysitting, is she? We got that thing tonight."

"Oh, right, forgot about that. But no, your grandparents have him."

Jess nodded while walking further into the room. "We'll be back by 11, if I can pry her away from her school crap for that long."

"If you're gonna be later than that-"

"Call you. Yeah, I know."

Lorelai smiled while flipping her curls from her coat. "Have fun."

"Back at ya."

"I'm not wearing this stupid thing for more than an hour, so you better eat fast," Luke warned while coming from the second floor.

"Hey, no sex -talk in front of the minor."

With his face scrunched up in annoyance, Luke looked to Jess and asked, "What are you doing here?"

Jess pulled 2 tickets from his jacket pocket.

Luke nodded. "Not too late. She needs to study."

"Yup," Jess agreed before knocking at Rory's door.

Luke sighed. "Let's go. Hour starts when we get in the car."

_Silvano's_

"We could-a went to Buddy and Maisy. Don't have to wear a tie there," Luke complained while pulling at the red tie wrapped around his neck.

"Can you hit the pause button on the whining? I need to talk to you about something."

"What?" Luke asked as a waiter appeared at their table with a bottle of champagne.

"We need to start procreating, like, yesterday."

"Lorelai," Luke hissed, his stare darting to the water who quickly finished pouring 2 glasses, then hurried off to another table.

"Your mom brought it up again today"

"Do we have to talk about this here?"

"We said we wanted more than one kid, right? Well, Andy's already a year old and I don't' want them to be too far apart in age, so we need to get moving. Plus, I'm gonna be 33 in March, and yes, I know my biological clock isn't ready to explode, but the hands are still ticking and I want another baby."

Realizing the conversation was happening then and there whether he wanted it to or not, Luke said, "We'd have to move, Lorelai. We can't fit another kid where we are."

Lorelai's face fell. "You don't want another baby."

"What? No, I didn't say that. You know we'd have to move first. As it is, we had to turn the extra bathroom into a nursery. We're outta rooms. We'd have to move. That's all I'm saying."

Lorelai nodded, her face pensive.

At the look of disappointment his wife wore, Luke said, "We can look into adding on, but you know how much crap we'd get from Taylor? How many permits we'd need? And it wouldn't just be adding another room. Andy's starting to outgrow the nursery; we'd have to make his room bigger too. And then there's the cost. We don't have much money saved away. Between keeping up with the baby and paying for Chilton and everything else, our account is pretty wiped, even with my parents helping out."

Lorelai nodded in understanding. Everything Luke said, she knew it made sense, she knew he was right. "We should order."

"Hey."

Lorelai peaked up from the menu in her hands.

"I want another kid," Luke said firmly. "Whatever we have to do, we'll do it."

"But-"

"Whatever we have to do, Lorelai. You wanna move, we'll move. You wanna stay where we are, we'll make it work. We'll find a way."

A slow smile came to Lorelai's lips as she held her husbands stare. "Thank you," she whispered sincerely.

Luke nodded. "Now hurry up and figure out what you want; I don't think I'm gonna make it an hour."

Meanwhile, at the Crapshack, Rory was sitting on the center of her bed, an A.P bio textbook sitting in her hap, a pencil in her hand, and just short of a million index cards scattered across her bed. Not a stitch of blanket was in sight as each card was filled to the max in lead.

Rory was about to begin her millionth card when there was a knock at the door.

"You decent?"

"Jess?"

At his name, Jess opened the door, his eyes immediately widening at the mess on her bed.

"I'm studying," Rory defended at the look on his face.

"Studying what? Every topic known to man?" he asked while picking up a card.

"I have a test on Friday," she explained impatiently.

"That's a week away."

"6 days."

"Close enough."

Rory released a frustrated breath. "Is there a reason you're here?"

"To pick you up."

"What are you talking about?"

"Last week, Andy's party… You were supposed to be ready by 7:00. It's 7:04. You ready?"

"Ready for what?"

"You'll find out when we get there. Bus leaves in 20. Let's go," he said before leaving the room.

"Go where? Jess!"

_XOX_

"You're not gonna blindfold me are you?" Rory asked while following Jess to a seat on the moving bus.

"Relax. I'm not kidnapping you."

"Why won't you tell me where we're going?"

"Ever hear of a surprise?"

"I hate surprises."

"Then call it something else."

"Jess," Rory whined.

"You Gilmores are impatient."

"Tell me."

Jess pulled a ticket from his pocket. "Read."

Rory plucked the ticket from his hand. "**The Best of the 90's**… I don't get it. The best what?"

"Keep reading."

Rory looked back to the ticket. "**Enjoy new versions of past hit songs. **We're going to a concert?"

"Yup."

"A concert with the best songs from the 90's?"

"It's 2 hours of crappy cover bands singing crappy songs. You like to mock things, well, here's your chance. I read the line up; it had bands like The Hanson Brothers, and NYSNC. Best 20 bucks I ever spent."

"Worst 20 bucks you ever spent."

"It'll distract you for a while, right?"

"I guess."

"Then I didn't waste my hard earned cash," he said through a grin.

Rory smiled.

_XOX_

"You'd think by now you'd just do it."

"Do what?"

"Hold my hand. We're on date, incase you haven't noticed."

"We're going to the car. Date's over."

"We're walking, aren't we? You could hold my hand."

"The truck is ten feet away."

"You suck at dating."

Luke rolled his eyes while reaching for her hand.

Lorelai flashed a victorious smile.

"So, what are the odds we stop for milkshakes on the way home?"

"Slim."

"How slim?"

"Very."

"Luke."

"Lorelai."

"Buy me a milkshake and I'll have sex with you tonight."

"You'll do it anyway," Luke said while opening the passenger door.

"Oh yeah?" Lorelai challenged as she climbed to her seat. "You sure about that?"

"Yup," he said confidently.

"Okay," Lorelai sang. "If you're sure. But let's remember, I've got a busy day tomorrow, so I'll probably be too exhausted to do anything when the sun goes down, and we both know how hectic things get during the week. But okay, if you're sure, let's go home."

He was sure. Or he thought he was sure. But as Luke stood with his hand poised on the door, ready to push it closed, her words stopped him. His brows furrowed in concentration as he looked at Lorelai carefully.

"What are you waiting for? Close the door; it's cold."

"I'm thinking," Luke grumbled.

"Don't hurt yourself."

_XOX_

"This almost makes up for the hand holding thing."

Luke sighed as she took a generous sip from the large chocolate milkshake in her hands.

"So, what's your plan for tomorrow? Gonna have a boys day out? Jess mentioned something about being forced into slave labor."

"We're cleaning out the garage, so if there's anything you don't want thrown out you better claim it in the morning."

Lorelai nodded. "Most of that stuff can probably go to charity, so make sure you go through it all."

"Okay."

"I can't believe Jess would rather spend the day cleaning than go to the mall with us."

"He knows how you shop," Luke said while grinning.

"Like pros?"

"Unfortunately."

Lorelai spread a large smile.

_XOX_

"So? What'd you think?"

"It was… bad… it… I can't think of another word for bad."

"Awful? Terrible? Dreadful? Horrible? Crappy?"

"What are you, a walking thesaurus?"

"I read a lot."

"So do I. Why couldn't I think of synonyms for bad?"

Jess smirked at her frown. "So, is it killing you to be away from your index cards, or can I convince you to stop for ice cream?"

"You can try."

"There's a Carvel on the way back. By the time we go in, get a couple-a cones, another bus'll be on the way. Plus, I mean, come on, it's the weekend. Weekends scream ice cream."

"I am kinda hungry."

"You know you want rocky road on a cone. Come on, you'll be home in an hour, hour-hour and a half tops, then it's right back to that giant textbook."

Rory thought for a moment before showing him her smile. "3 scoops."

Jess returned her smile. "You got it."

_XOX_

_Crapshack_

"Ball, say ball."

From his mother's lap, Andy reached for the small red ball Lorelai held.

Lorelai plucked the pacifier from the boy's mouth. "Ball," she repeated slowly. "Come on, baby, say ball."

When Andy crammed the ball in his mouth, Lorelai sighed and said, "Okay, I get it. You don't wanna say ball. I shouldn't be pushing you anyway. A little soon for that, huh? Mommy's being paranoid, ignore her."

"Alright, you had your 5 minutes," Luke announced while coming from the bathroom and heading straight for the bed. "Your time's up, little man. She's mine now," he said while lifting Andy from Lorelai's grip.

"Hey! I wasn't done with him!"

"Binky," Luke requested while holding the boy in the air.

"Give him back."

"You said 5 minutes. It's been 5 minutes."

"I barely saw him today."

"You're spending the whole day with him tomorrow; I get you tonight. Binky."

"Fine," Lorelai gave in while leaning from the headboard to put the pacifier in Andy's mouth.

"Say goodnight."

"Night, baby. Sleep good," Lorelai wished before kissing Andy's head.

"You have one minute to take that off. I want you naked by the time I get back," Luke warned.

While Luke left the room, Lorelai looked down to frown at the black dress she wore, the words "bossy man" slipping from her lips.

TBC…

**Review? Come on, you know you want to. Thanks for reading! :D**


	5. Oh, Crap

Big thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter!

Hope everyone's enjoying the ride so far!

Read on!

**Smug Marrieds & Jam Hands**

**Chapter Five: Oh, Crap**

_CrapShack_

"Get up."

"Ughhhh."

"Lorelai."

"Go'way, your fault," Lorelai groaned while rolling to her belly and burying her face in a pillow.

Luke smiled at the accusation. It was his fault. He kept her up late. But Luke forced his mind away from the happy memory to focus on the task at hand. It was hard enough for Luke to rouse his wife at an early hour and with having been awake later than normal, he wasn't' surprised she was putting up a fight.

"You told me to wake you up at 8:00. It's 8:42."

Lorelai moaned louder while yanking the blanket over her head.

Luke huffed in frustration from where he stood at his dresser fastening a watch around his wrist. He narrowed his eyes at the stubborn lump balled up on the bed. He then looked to his left, quickly darting his stare to the alarm clock and back to Lorelai. He found the time was still 8:42. His mom was arriving at 12:00. She was never late, never ever. She was always on time- earlier than on time. Luke was sure his mom would pull up the drive around 11:40, or maybe even before that. Lorelai needed at least an hour to shower and get her makeup done and everything else she did in the bathroom. Then a half hour to pick out her outfit. Another half hour to eat breakfast. While she had no problem scarfing down her food in record time, Luke prefer she sit down and actually take the time to chew and swallow without nearly chocking. Though changing the food Lorelai consumed was something Luke accomplished only ever so slightly when she was pregnant and threats of an unhealthy newborn were tossed around left and right. But it was all to easy for Luke to get Lorelai to stay put long enough so she could take her sweet time savoring each and every bite.

Doing the math, Luke calculated that Lorelai needed two hours to get ready- three if she was having trouble with her hair and/or couldn't figure out what to wear. Luke knew he had to get her up now or he'd catch hell later for "letting her" over sleep.

Without a word, Luke strode with purpose across the room and to the door

Hearing Luke's footsteps disappear down the hall, Lorelai thought Luke was gone, that he'd given up. She smiled, her lips curving to a victorious smile as she turned to her side and snuggled further in the blanket. Her body settled, she relaxed; her mind was drifting, her thoughts floating away. She was falling back asleep.

Was. Almost. So close, yet so far.

Luke came barreling into the room, his boots slapping against the hardwood floor as he stomped his way to the bed.

Lorelai held her breathe, her eyes closed tight as she lie facing away from the door, waiting with nervous anticipation for his next move.

Luke paused, silence enveloping the room as he looked to the bright-eyed baby hanging at his hip. "Ready?" he whispered to the boy's ear.

While gnawing on a toy block, Andy looked to his dad with big, alert eyes.

Luke put a feather light kiss to Andy's wispy blond hair before murmuring the words, "wake up mama."

Andy turned to point a dimpled finger at the bed.

Lorelai's brows furrowed as she heard slow, careful steps coming towards her.

And then something akin to a sac of potatoes- a big sac of potatoes- dropped to her butt.

"No sudden movements," Luke cautioned. "He falls off the bed again and this time it'll be your fault."

"Luukkkkeee!" Lorelai whined.

A satisfied smirk popped to Luke's face as Andy heaved himself to his hands and knees.

"Ow, ow, ugh!" Lorelai complained when Andy started climbing unsteadily across her body. "Hey, no, stop, that hurts! I'm not the tin man! I have organs in me that aren't meant to be jabbed!"

Luke clasped his hands together while saying, "you up now? Good. Get in the shower. Eggs'll be ready when you're done," he instructed happily before leaving the room.

Lorelai whipped the covers from her face to be met with a pair of smiling blue eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, morning," she grumbled.

_XOX_

"I'm outta here by 5:00," Jess announced while walking through the unlocked front door.

"Well, hello there, sunshine."

Jess spared Lorelai a small wave while heading to the coffeemaker for a shot of caffeine. When he found there to be not a drop in the pot, he turned to the table, his accusing stare sending daggers Lorelai's way.

Lorelai swallowed hard, the big bite of bacon scratching against her throat as she hastily forced it down. "Don't' look at me; she finished the coffee."

Jess shifted his glare to Rory who matched him with a look of innocence that mirrored a three year old who'd just been caught stealing from the cookie jar.

Jess's face melted to a mournful frown in seconds. "Why do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"That… that look on your face."

"Beware the powers of the Rory face," Lorelai warned.

"Who finished the coffee?" Jess demanded.

"Lorelai," Luke supplied while rushing through the room with a towel clad Andy at his hip, strands of wet hair peaking out from a cotton blue hood.

"Luke!" Lorelai exclaimed while dropping her fork to her plate. "Are you crazy? It's freezing! Maybe if someone wasn't all anal Nazi about the heat being on 24/7, the house wouldn't be as cold as the north pole, but you are and it is and he's wet!" Lorelai sputtered quickly as she yanked Andy from Luke and slid the baby to her lap.

Luke's brows were knit fiercely, carving deep lines to his forehead as he all but glared at his one year old. "He won't let me put his clothes on."

"I wouldn't either if I were him. He knows you'll stretch out his beloved footsie pajamas."

Luke growled her name.

Lorelai wrapped her arms around Andy, holding him to her chest protectively. "Let's go get you something to wear, huh? It's too cold to go streaking."

"Won't let me do anything," Luke grumbled in complaint as the pair passed.

"So, he's a mama's boy; he'll grow out of it," Jess brushed off while stealing Lorelai's vacated seat.

"Heard that!" Lorelai yelled from the next room.

Jess flashed a devious grin while swiping a strip of bacon from Rory's plate.

"Hey!" Rory exclaimed.

"Snooze ya lose, Gilmore."

Rory frowned like a sad puppy dog, folding her arms across her chest while leaning back in her chair. She looked to Luke and said, "Why did you let him in here?"

"I was upstairs."

"Door was unlocked; no one _let _me in," Jess explained while ripping a corner from the half eaten hash brown on Rory's plate.

"Stop! Get your own breakfast!"

"Whatever happened to 'sharing is caring?" Jess asked as Rory slid her plate to her lap.

"Whatever happened to this is my breakfast and I'm hungry, so you can get your own," Rory said before cutting into the center of her egg, the yoke spilling beneath a small mountain of pancakes and what remained of her bacon, sausage, and hash brown.

Suffice to say, Luke didn't win the morning battle for a healthy breakfast.

"Yeah, well, not all of us have a short order cook at our disposal," Jess retorted while standing from his chair.

"You want something?" Luke offered. "I've already made a dozen eggs in the last hour; two more won't kill me."

Jess shook his head. "I'm going to the diner to get a donut. I'll be back."

"Oh, bring me one!"

"You don't share, I don't share!" Jess shouted at Rory's request before leaving.

"Damn," Rory muttered.

Luke smiled.

_XOX_

_The Mall_

"Okay," Lorelai started, her voice and eyes filled with excitement as she led the way through the Macy's entrance, "I'm thinking we hit Toys R Us first, let the little guy go nuts, then head to Barnes and Noble," she continued while looking to Rory, "and give you a wad of cash to run wild with. Then I was hoping you'd be the best big sister in the world and take your brother on the carousel a few thousand times while mommy and grandma explore the wonders of Sephora and Victoria's Secret."

Rory rolled her eyes at her mother's loaded compliment.

"Please, please, please!" Lorelai begged.

"Give me control of the T.V for a week and I'll put him on the carousel until he gets dizzy and passes out."

"Deal!"

Val sighed a happy breath. "The way you two act, you make me feel ten years younger, and I love it."

"Oh, I vowed to stay forever young a long, long time ago," Lorelai said while pushing along Andy's stroller.

"Age is but a number," Rory added.

"Quite the poet I've raised."

Valerie smiled at Lorelai's words. "Toys R Us, here we come."

_XOX_

"Holy crap."

"They're pack rats, both of 'em," Luke grumped.

Jess stood beside his uncle, both men starring at the open garage. Jess's stare was wide with awe and wonder while Luke's eyes burned with annoyance.

"Are those platform shoes?"

"You don't remember the 60's themed Halloween?"

"Oh, yeah," Jess realized through a growing smirk. "You in that giant afro is hard to forget."

"Lorelai made me," Luke defended.

"Right, right. Hey, remind me to buy you a new leash, one with a little more slack."

"Shut up."

Jess's lips curved further. "Everything go in the trash?"

Luke shook his head while approaching the garage. "We have to go through it all, see what can go to charity."

"Those the orders you were given, private?"

"Stop."

Jess looked to his wrist. "You got 2 hours 'till I stop for lunch, then I'm gone by 5."

"Walmart?"

"Yup."

"Alright," Luke agreed while releasing a longing sigh. "After you."

_XOX_

"Look, Andy, its toy heaven!" Lorelai enthused as the group walked into their first stop.

Andy whimpered while trying to squirm from his mother's grasp.

"Hey, hey, keep your diaper on; I'm putting you down."

Once Lorelai planted Andy on wobbly feet, Val reached for her grandson's hand.

"Where to first?" Val asked while looking down at the baby.

Andy didn't know where to begin. He stood still, his body merely swaying a bit as he looked around with wide eyes. The one year old was overwhelmed. There was such a vast array of toys that the large selection confused him.

"Maybe he needs a countdown. You know, like they do at car races," Rory suggested.

Andy looked over his shoulder at the sound of his sister's voice.

"Don't you want any toys?" Rory asked. "You've got a ton of birthday money to spend."

"Yes, and I would take advantage of this opportunity because I'd bet on the life of Bono that never again will your dad let you spend a butt load of cash on toys when the money could be 'saved away for college, because that's important,'" Lorelai finished with air quotes, her voice mocking Luke.

"You do realize he didn't understand that, right?"

Lorelai shrugged. "He got the dad part and I'm sure 'toy' rang through loud and clear; that's something."

"Ignore your crazy mommy," Val warned while scooping Andy into her arms. "I know what you like; let's go shop."

_XOX_

"What is this?"

"What does it look like, wise guy?"

Jess shrugged and said, "the world."

"There ya go."

"Yeah, but what is it? A pillow?"

"Hug-a world."

"Did you just say the word 'hug'?"

Luke glared at his nephew. "You know I asked you over here to help, not to sit there commenting on every piece-a crap you find."

Jess dropped the stuffed replica of the earth to the ground before tossing his hands up in surrender.

"Funny. Now get up and help me move this."

"Yes, sir."

Luke didn't bother saying anything as he wrapped his fingers around the bottom of a large cardboard box. Jess took his time walking to Luke and then took even more time getting a good grip around the box.

"Lift," Luke instructed impatiently.

Jess did as he was told and together they carried the box away from the piles of squared cardboard and set it down on the lawn.

"What's in here?" Jess asked as carefully, they lowered the box to the ground.

"Don't know. Find out in a second," Luke said before pulling open the closed panels on top.

Jess loomed over the box and said, "What the hell is that?"

_XOX_

"Go, Diego, go!" Rory sang.

Andy laughed while tapping persistently at the mouth of a talking Diego doll in his sister's hand.

"Is it me or is there a theme going here?"

Val smiled at the stopping cart full of Diego toys and movies and books that almost piled to the top. "The boy likes Diego."

"Likes? Obsessed is more like it. And you, I'm surprised you're not pushing Toy Story on him."

Discreetly, Val looked to her right and her left as if she were about to divulge a secret no one could find out about.

"I'm slipping this in while we're on line," Val whispered to Lorelai after revealing a buzz light-year doll.

"You sneaky broad."

"He has Andy; he should have Buzz too. Oh, and he needs a new Woody. I keep forgetting to get him one."

Lorelai smiled. "Yes, and yes. Here, he's not looking, slip it in between these puzzles."

Val wedged the buzz doll between two Diego puzzles as Lorelai held them apart.

"He doesn't sleep on the floor, does he?"

"Who?"

"Andy."

Lorelai's brows furrowed as she said, "You're not going senile on me, are you?"

"What?"

"A crib. Andy sleeps in a crib," Lorelai said slowly.

Val rolled her eyes. "The doll Andy. From the movie."

Lorelai winced while saying, "Would you have a melt down if I said yes?"

Valerie sighed. "I just don't get why he doesn't like Toy Story."

"He likes it; he's just not head over heals in love with the movie, like _some_ people."

"I know, but… why?" she asked desperately.

Lorelai pulled a smile while tossing her arm over Val's shoulder. "His love lies with that spunky little Spanish animal rescuer. I'm sorry."

"Maybe we should watch a different movie later," Val murmured thoughtfully.

"No, no the plan is to watch Toy Story 2, so we will be watching Toy Story 2. He'll be so worn out from a long day of shopping that he'll probably be out cold by the time we get home anyway. The only thing he'll be watching is the inside of his eye lids so don't worry about him."

"I can't believe he fell asleep at the party."

Lorelai smiled further at the thought of Andy's birthday bash, the one year old having slipped to dreamland before the movie was a half hour in.

"Okay," Rory said while getting to her feet and turning to Valerie and Lorelai, "he wants this," she said while dropping the doll to the cart.

"Good. Let's go pay. Hot stuff over there has reached his limit.

_XOX_

Luke looked into the box to see scrapes of metal, webs of wires, piles of small tools and various beat up remote controllers, like ones from a child's toy race car.

"Oh, uh," Luke started while racking his brain. "Rory's 6th- no, 7th grade science fair. She and Lane tried to build a robot. Didn't work out too well."

"Robot? I don't remember a robot."

Luke shrugged while stepping over a box of Lorelai's old clothes that were in the charity pile. "Maybe you were with your mom. She only spent a few days on it before giving up."

"Maybe," Jess murmured.

Luke looked down at his watch. "It's almost 2:00. Lunch?"

Jess nodded.

"Put all that in a garbage bag," he started while gesturing to the failed robot box. "I'll make some sandwiches."

"Why'd she wanna build a robot?"

Luke turned with one boot on the porch. "Science fair."

"Yeah, I know, but why a robot? Why not something easier?"

"She thought a robot would get her first place, but she ended up doing something with plants."

"Did she win?"

Luke shook his head. "3rd place."

Jess nodded while looking back to the box. "I'll be right in."

_XOX_

"I'll pay for these," Rory said while looking to the tall stack of books piled at her chest. "Meet you at the food court?"

Lorelai nodded in agreement while pulling money from her pocket.

Rory frowned at the numbers stamped on the bills. "That's too much, mom."

"If you have change, keep it. Your brother got 150 to spend, so you get 150 to spend. Gotta keep things fair; don't need the sibling rivalry to kick in. But remember, it is perfectly natural to harbor jealous feelings towards your little bother. After all, he is the baby of the house, and your cute, drooly days have long since passed. It's completely understandable if from time to time you feel the need to smush a pillow over your brother's face and suffocate him during the dead of night."

"Sounds like that would make a great Stephen King novel. Now go, before all the big tables are taken."

"Lunch, here I come!" Lorelai cheered while turning the empty stroller to the door with her sights set on Bath & Body Works.

Lorelai weaved through the crowd and between carts filled with merchandise from sunglasses to make your own T-shirts. When she reached Bath & Body works where Val had gone just minutes ago to browse for a bottle of body spray, Lorelai smiled when through the window she spotted her mother-in-law by a display case.

Lorelai turned into the store, ready to call for Val when a red head appeared at her side.

Lorelai watched with curiosity as Val turned to talk to the woman. The two exchanged words before Val swiveled around with her hand on the woman's shoulder. When Val saw Lorelai by the door, her expression-already bright as a twinkling Christmas tree- lit even brighter.

"Lorelai, good, I'm done! And look who I found!"

Lorelai worked to hold back a frown, but the words 'oh, crap,' echoed through her head at the woman standing beside Val.

_XOX_

Jess managed to carefully load Rory's unfinished science project to the bed of Luke's truck. He figured he'd borrow the keys later on to haul the parts to his apartment, but for now his stomach was growling for nourishment.

Jess jumped from his uncle's truck to land perfectly on the grass-covered lawn. Before he could head for the porch, he heard a grumbling motorcycle approaching. Jess turned, his guard up as he watched while the guy pulled a helmet from his head.

Jess sighed, his eyes rolling with annoyance as he mumbled under his breath.

_TBC…_

**Short, I know, but I just can't resist the lure of the cliffhanger. **

**Review? I hope you will! :D**

**P.S- New 'Gilmore girls' is in the works. Will be up in the next day or two!**


	6. The Green Monster

Author's Note-

It's been way, WAY too long, I know! I'm sorry! Forgive me? Hope so!

This post is short, but only because I don't like to time jump in the middle of a chapter. It's more like, part two of chapter five. Sorry for the lack of length! Hopefully the contents make up for it!

Oh and I'm posting a big HELP WANTED sign here. I am in desperate need of a beta reader for my Gilmore girls fan fictions. Anyone interested in helping me out? Please PM me!

Okay, here we go!

**Smug Marrieds & Jam Hands**

**Chapter Six: The Green Monster**

Jess jumped from his uncle's truck to land perfectly on the grass-covered lawn. Before he could head for the porch, he heard a grumbling motorcycle approaching. Jess turned, his guard up as he watched while the guy pulled a helmet from his head.

When the man's identity was reveled, Jess rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"What are you doing here?" Jess demanded.

Parking his bike, Dean put his helmet on the seat, and then turned for the cardboard box that was strapped to the back.

"Rory's not here," Jess said while crossing his arms over his chest.

"I know. Can you just give this to her," Dean requested while holding out the box.

"What is it?" Jess asked suspiciously.

"Not that it's any of your business, but its some stuff that she left at my place."

With a skeptical look on his face, Jess took the box. "You live two blocks away. You couldn't walk it over?"

"Again, not that it's any of your business, but I'm on my way out of town. Wanted to drop this off when I knew she wouldn't be here. She probably doesn't want to see me."

"Nope."

"So, you'll give it to her?"

"Yup. You can go now," Jess ordered hastily.

Not in the mood to go ten rounds with Jess, Dean grabbed his helmet and got back on his bike.

Jess watched as Dean turned onto the street. When he was gone from sight, Jess sighed while looking down at the tapped up box in his hands.

_XOX_

_The Mall_

Lorelai weaved through the crowd and between carts filled with merchandise from sunglasses to make your own T-shirts. When she reached Bath & Body Works where Val had gone just minutes ago to browse for a bottle of body spray, Lorelai smiled when through the window she spotted her mother-in-law by a display case.

Lorelai turned into the store, ready to call for Val when a red head appeared at her side. Lorelai watched with curiosity as Val talked to the woman. The two exchanged words before Val swiveled around with her hand on the woman's shoulder. When Val saw Lorelai by the door, her expression-already bright as a Christmas tree- lit even further.

"Lorelai, good, I'm done! And look who I found!"

Lorelai worked to hold back a frown, but the words, "Oh, crap,' echoed through her head at the woman standing beside Val.

"Hello, Lorelai," Emily said politely.

"Mom," Lorelai greeted, matching Emily's tone.

"It took a little arm twisting, but I got Emily to agree to join us for lunch. Isn't that nice?" Val said while giving her daughter- in-law a look.

Wiping out a smile, Lorelai nodded and said, "Sounds great. How's a little of everything? Rory and I can't decide what to have, so we thought we'd keep our options open."

"That sounds fine. I wasn't aware there was a place to eat here."

Frowning, Lorelai asked, "you didn't know the mall had a food court?"

Emily shook her head.

With confusion on her face, Lorelai said, "so where do you go when you're shopping and you get hungry?"

"I leave and go to a restaurant," Emily explained primly.

"But all these years you've been shopping here; how could you not know there's a –"

"Who's hungry?" Val interrupted. "Cause I sure am! Rory's waiting for us anyway. We should go!" she urged.

"But-"

"Come on, Lorelai," Val said while taking Lorelai's hand and ushering her through the crowd.

_XOX_

_Crapshack_

"Guess who just stopped by?"

"Who?" Luke asked while going about the kitchen getting lunch ready.

"The douche bag you and grandpa wanted to run outta town."

"Dean?" Luke questioned from the counter where cold cuts and bread were spread out.

"Yup."

"Don't call him that."

"Well, I can't call him son-in-law."

"Jess," Luke scolded.

"He left this," Jess explained while putting the brown box on the counter.

"What is it?"

"Rory's stuff. Guess she left some things with him."

"Well, put it in her room."

Jess nodded while walking the box to Rory's room. He couldn't help a frown while placing it on her bed.

_XOX_

_The Mall_

"Why are you fussy, little guy? You just had the best shopping spree a baby could ask for. You should be happy," Lorelai said while holding a crying Andy, rocking him back and forth.

"Isn't it naptime? He's probably tired," Rory threw in while finishing her pizza.

Emily watched with a frown on her face as her daughter tried to calm Andy. She almost found herself asking if she could give it a try when her chance was taken from her.

"Here, let grandma give it a whirl," Val said while holding her arms out.

With a growing frown, Emily couldn't help but look on as Valerie took Andy and settled the one year old over her shoulder. Rubbing circles over his back, Val hummed an unfamiliar song to Emily while rocking him back and forth.

Not a minute later and the cries sounded.

"Grandma's got the magic touch, huh?" Lorelai whispered before kissing the boy's plump cheek.

"Yes, she does," Val agreed proudly.

Suddenly, the scene became too much for Emily to bear. So she stood from her seat and announced that she had to go. She had somewhere important to be.

"Okay… well, thanks for having lunch with us," Lorelai said.

"Thank you for inviting me," Emily returned before saying her goodbyes and leaving.

Looking at Valerie holding Andy, Lorelai couldn't help but wonder about Luke's theory.

_XOX_

_CrapShack_

"Can't believe we finished," Jess awed at the now cleaned out garage.

"It did seem like an endless pile of junk for a while."

"Think they'll be okay with what we gave away?"

"What they don't know won't hurt them."

"Right," Jess agreed.

"Thanks for your help. You're free to go now."

Looking down at his watch, Jess said, "I gotta head to work anyway."

Luke nodded. "See ya tomorrow."

"Yup."

Jess turned to walk away, but he didn't get very far before his uncle called his name.

"Yeah?"

"What you did for Rory last night, taking her to that concert, I think it did her some good. She seemed better this morning."

Through a shrug, Jess said, "thought it might help."

"Well, it did. Thanks."

_Anything for her, _Jess thought, but instead he simply agreed and left for work.

_XOX_

Later on that evening, Luke was in the kitchen making dinner with Rory while Val, Lorelai and a sleeping Andy where cuddled up in the living room watching 'Toy Story 2.'

Sitting on the couch next to each other, both women had their feet up on the coffee table when Val turned to Lorelai and said, "did you have a good day?"

Showing Val a smile, Lorelai said, "yes. We all did."

Val matched the curve of Lorelai's lips while saying, "good," and taking Lorelai's hand, who then frowned at the action.

"Something wrong?"

"This," Lorelai said while holding up their joint hands.

"What?"

"It's just… never mind. It's stupid."

"Tell me," Val urged gently.

Lorelai sighed. "You holding my hand… it's something my mother would never do. It's something she never did do."

"Oh, sweetie, people show affection in different ways. Me? I'm a hands on kinda person."

"Were you like this with Luke?"

"Of course. I mean, when he got to a certain age, he stopped letting me hold his hand in public, but yes."

"He knew you loved him."

"Yes."

"Must be a nice feeling," Lorelai murmured.

_To Be Continued…._

**Review? Pretty please, :D**


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